Funny Cat Quotes - Page 3

• If a dog jumps into your lap, it is because he is fond of you; but if a cat does the same thing, it is because your lap is warmer.

  Alfred North Whitehead

  Dog, Cat, Animal

  Alfred North Whitehead, Lucien Price (2001). “Dialogues of Alfred North Whitehead”, p.183, David R. Godine Publisher

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• The problem with cats is that they get the exact same look on their face whether they see a moth or an axe-murderer.

  Paula Poundstone

  Funny, Motivational, Cat

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• I believe cats to be spirits come to earth. A cat, I am sure, could walk on a cloud without coming through.

  Jules Verne

  Believe, Cat, Clouds

  "Biography/ Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

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• Way down deep, we're all motivated by the same urges. Cats have the courage to live by them.

  Jim Davis

  Cat, Animal, Humanity

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• Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.

  Robert A. Heinlein

  Love, Inspirational, Funny

  "Time Enough for Love". Book by Robert A. Heinlein, 1973.

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• A dog's idea of personal grooming is to roll on a dead fish.

  James P. Gorman

  Dog, Cat, Ideas

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• Cat: a pygmy lion who loves mice, hates dogs, and patronizes human beings.

  Oliver Herford

  Love, Dog, Hate

  "Attributed to Oliver Herford in The Reader's Digest, Volume 121 (p. 118)". 1982.

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• Even overweight cats instinctively know the cardinal rule: when fat, arrange yourself in slim poses.

  John Weitz

  Cat, Animal, Humanity

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• If you want to write, keep cats.

  Aldous Huxley

  Writing, Cat, Want

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• You see, wire telegraph is a kind of a very, very long cat. You pull his tail in New York and his head is meowing in Los Angeles. Do you understand this? And radio operates exactly the same way: you send signals here, they receive them there. The only difference is that there is no cat.

  Albert Einstein

  Inspirational, Funny, Motivational

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• Our perfect companions never have fewer than four feet.

  Sidonie Gabrielle Colette

  Dog, Cat, Animal

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• By and large, people who enjoy teaching animals to roll over will find themselves happier with a dog.

  Barbara Holland

  Dog, Teaching, Cat

  Barbara Holland (1994). “Secrets of the Cat: Its Lore, Legend, and Lives”, Ivy Books

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• The naming of cats is a difficult matter

  T. S. Eliot

  Cat, Matter, Difficult

  Old Possum's Book of Practical Cats "The Naming of Cats" l. 1 (1939)

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• Cats were put into the world to disprove the dogma that all things were created to serve man.

  Paul Gray

  Cat, Animal, Men

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• Cats possess so many of the same qualities as some poeple that it is often hard to tell the people and the cats apart.

  P. J. O'Rourke

  Cat, People, Quality

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• I love them, they are so nice and selfish. Dogs are TOO good and unselfish. They make me feel uncomfortable. But cats are gloriously human.

  Lucy Maud Montgomery

  Dog, Selfish, Nice

  Lucy Maud Montgomery (2015). “Anne of Green Gables Collection: Anne of Green Gables, Anne of the Island, and More Anne Shirley Books”, p.640, Xist Publishing

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• One of the most striking differences between a cat and a lie is that a cat has only nine lives.

  Mark Twain

  Funny, Life, Witty

  Pudd'nhead Wilson ch. 7, "Pudd'nhead Wilson's Calendar" (1894)

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• If man could be crossed with the cat, it would improve man but deteriorate the cat.

  Mark Twain

  Inspiration, Cat, Men

  Mark Twain (2012). “Mark Twain at Your Fingertips: A Book of Quotations”, p.39, Courier Corporation

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• In ancient times cats were worshiped as gods; they have not forgotten this.

  Terry Pratchett

  Inspirational, Motivational, Cat

  "Ghost Cats : Human Encounters with Feline Spirits" by Dusty Rainbolt, (p. 7), 2007.

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• Who can believe that there is no soul behind those luminous eyes!

  Theophile Gautier

  Inspirational, Motivational, Dog

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• I am fond of pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals.

  Winston Churchill

  Funny, Life, Leadership

  Speech at the Reform Club, April 28, 1981.

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• Authors like cats because they are such quiet, lovable, wise creatures, and cats like authors for the same reasons.

  Robertson Davies

  Love, Funny, Wise

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• There are two means of refuge from the miseries of life: music and cats.

  Albert Schweitzer

  Love, Funny, Music

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• I wish I could write as mysterious as a cat.

  Edgar Allan Poe

  Inspirational, Life, Writing

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• If cats looked like frogs we'd realize what nasty, cruel little bastards they are. Style. That's what people remember.

  Terry Pratchett

  Life, Cat, People

  "Lords and Ladies" by Terry Pratchett, Harper, (p. 158), October 2008.

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