Hog Quotes - Page 4

• Happiness, like health, is probably also only a passing accident. For a moment or two the organism is irritated so little that it is not conscious of it; for the duration of that moment it is happy. Thus a hog is always happier than a man, and a bacillus is happier than a hog

  H. L. Mencken

  Men, Two, Duration

  H.L. Mencken (2012). “Mencken Chrestomathy”, p.375, Vintage

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• To steale the Hog, and give the feet for almes.
  [To steal the hog, and give the feet to alms.]

  George Herbert

  Feet, Giving, Philanthropy

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• Sometimes the table was graced with immense apple-pies, or saucers full of preserved peaches and pears; but it was always sure to boast an enormous dish of balls of sweetened dough, fried in hog's fat, and called doughnuts, or olykoeks - a delicious kind of cake, at present scarce known in this city, except in genuine Dutch families.

  Washington Irving

  Food, Apples, Pie

  Washington Irving (1854). “The Works”

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• I'd rather be a born-once hog than a born-again Christian any day.

  Carolyn Chute

  Christian, Religion, Born Again

  Carolyn Chute (2008). “The Beans of Egypt, Maine”, p.161, Grove/Atlantic, Inc.

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• We were so poor as kids. I didn't even see a bathtub, running water, hot water, commode - we didn't have any of that. We started with a humble log house, milk cow, garden-raised our own food, killed a hog every year in the fall, and had the meat hanging up in the smokehouse - that was our childhood, me and ol' Si.

  Phil Robertson

  Running, Fall, Kids

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• It seems hardly fair to quarrel with a place because its staple commodity is not pretty, but I am sure I should have liked Cincinnati much better if the people had not dealt so very largely in hogs.

  Frances Trollope

  Should Have, Cities, People

  Frances Trollope (2015). “Domestic Manners of the Americans”, p.65, Sheba Blake Publishing

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• You may see me, fat and shining, with well-cared for hide, . . . a hog from Epicurus' herd.
  [Lat., Me pinguem et nitidum bene curata cute vises,
  . . . Epicuri de grege porcum.]

  Horace

  Cute, Shining, May

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• A robin red-breast in a cage, puts all of Heaven in a rage. Think to yourself that every day is your last. The hour to which you do not look forward will come as a welcome surprise. As for me, when you want a good laugh, you will find me in fine state... fat and sleek, a true hog of Epicurus's herd.

  Hannibal

  Thinking, Laughing, Heaven

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• Listen, if I heard shrieks and cries coming from a house and I ran in there and I found a great big broad shouldered whiskey soaked Joe weasel, dragging his wife about by the hair, and over here, two children are unconscious from his blows and kicks and another one screaming in terror, do you think I would apologize for being there? No! I'd knock 7 kinds of pork out of that old hog.

  Billy Sunday

  Children, Blow, Thinking

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• There isn't enough planet for everyone to eat as much meat as the United States does. The meat industry is responsible for a dead zone the size of New Jersey in the Gulf of Mexico every year because of the runoff through the Mississippi - runoff from hog farms basically nukes the water.

  Raj Patel

  Water, Enough, Responsible

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• I don't want them to kill no hog . . . . I want a man to go to that chair, on his own two feet.

  Thomas Jefferson

  Men, Two, Feet

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• Gambling is so pervasive in Nevada that maybe the state should just go the whole hog. There'd be gum machines that dispensed chewing tobacco if you lost. You could gamble for the toilet paper in public bathroom stalls. And fill out Keno cards in an attempt to win cancer therapy at the hospital.

  P. J. O'Rourke

  Cancer, Winning, Gambling

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• The nowadays ruling that no word is unprintable has, I think, done nothing whatever for beautiful letters. The boys have gone hog-wild with liberty, yet the short flat terms used over and over, both in dialogue and narrative, add neither vigor nor clarity; the effect is not of shock but of something far more dangerous — tedium.

  Dorothy Parker

  Beautiful, Thinking, Boys

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• I had to drive to Minneapolis once, and went on a back road just to see the country. But there was nothing to see. It's just flat and hot, and full of corn and soybeans and hogs. Every once in a while you come across a farm or some dead little town where the liveliest thing is the flies.

  Bill Bryson

  Country, Soybeans, Littles

  Bill Bryson (1989). “The Lost Continent: Travels in Small-town America”, p.5, VNR AG

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• People sometimes ask me if I would not give anything to be white, I answer, in the words of the song, most emphatically, 'No.'  How do I know what I might be if I were a white man?  I might be a sand-hog, burrowing away and losing my health for $8 a day.  I might be a street-car conductor at $12 or $15 a week.  There is many a white man less fortunate and less well equipped than I am.  In fact, I have never been able to discover that there was anything disgraceful in being a colored man.  But I have often found it inconvenient - in America.

  Bert Williams

  Song, Men, White Man

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• I was obsessed with livestock barns, cattle and hogs. I still love that, and I still do that as a hobby.So I'm a strange person.

  Larry the Cable Guy

  Hobbies, Barns, Strange Person

  Source: smashinginterviews.com

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• I hunt feral hogs. I try not to shoot creatures. That doesn't do anything for me. But big, nasty, smelly, bristly things with tusks that destroy everything that they touch. Yeah, I'll shoot them.

  David Feherty

  Trying, Nasty, Yeah

  Source: gearpatrol.com

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• How would you feel about sharing your bed?" she asked. Tristan blinked. "Excuse me?" "He'd love to!" Gary said. Tristan shot him a look, "Good," said Ivy, failing to notice Gary's wink. "Ella can be a pillow hog, but all you have to do is roll over her.

  Elizabeth Chandler

  Ivy, Bed, Looks

  Elizabeth Chandler (2011). “Kissed by an Angel”, p.84, Pan Macmillan

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• I'm independent as a hog on ice and a hog on ice is dead, cold, well-preserved and don't need a mother'grabbin, thing.

  Alice Childress

  Mother, Independent, Ice

  Alice Childress, Kathy A. Perkins (2011). “Selected Plays”, p.194, Northwestern University Press

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• Even under the most perfect Social Democracy we should, without Communism, still be living like hogs, except that each hog would get his fair share of grub.... Whilst we are hogs, let us at least be well-fed, healthy, reciprocally useful hogs, instead of--well, instead of the sort we are at present.

  George Bernard Shaw

  Perfect, Healthy, Democracy

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• There warn't anybody at the church, except maybe a hog or two, for there warn't any lock on the door, and hogs likes a puncheon floor in summer-time because it's cool. If you notice, most folks don't go to church only when they've got to; but a hog is different.

  Mark Twain

  Summer, Doors, Two

  Mark Twain (2012). “Mark Twain's Adventures of Tom Sawyer and Huckleberry Finn: The Original Text Edition”, p.352, NewSouth Books

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• Expect hogs to eat a lot more in the presence of a lot of hog wash.

  Charlie Munger

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• I think my science career had an arc to it that peaked in, let's say 2003/2004. I was in hog heaven, working in a corporation, getting paid pretty good money and doing really exciting research. And we had just done the Cool To Be You record, and I said well, we'll put this record out, but I can't tour it because I just want to do science. That's my gig, my future.

  Milo Aukerman

  Thinking, Careers, Heaven

  Source: vandalamagazine.com

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• People lucky enough to live in the vicinity of an industrial hog farm are, with each breath, made keenly aware of the cause of their declining property values.

  Al Franken

  People, Causes, Lucky

  Al Franken (2004). “Lies: And the Lying Liars Who Tell Them”, p.291, Penguin

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• If this is something you'd truly like to work on, not out of a sense of guilt but because you would enjoy occasionally reciprocating, there are a wealth of resources out there for the enthusiastic amateur (you are far from the only would-be blow-jobber whose spirit is willing but gag reflex is weak). You have more options than "no blow jobs, ever" and "regular whole-hog sessions to completion that result in vomiting."

  Mallory Ortberg

  Jobs, Blow, Guilt

  "Open Shut Case" by Mallory Ortberg, www.slate.com. December 22, 2015.

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