Wisdom that don't make us happier ain't worth plowing for.
There is gravity in wisdom, but no particular wisdom in gravity.
Society is composed of slow Christians and wide-awake sinners.
The dog that will follow everbody ain't worth a curse.
Most everyone seems willing to be a fool himself, but he can't bear to have anyone else one.
Waves are inspiring not because they rise and fail, but because each time they fall. They never fail to rise again.
Habits are like the wrinkles on a man's brow; if you will smooth out the one, I will smooth out the other.
A good way I know to find happiness, is to not bore a hole to fit the plug.
Sekts and creeds ov religion, are like pocket compesses, good enuff tu pinte out the direction, but the nearer the pole yu git thewuss tha wurk.
I think when the full horror of being fifty hits you, you should stay home and have a good cry.
Stupidity,--unconscious ignorance.
When you do laugh, open your mouth wide enough for the noise to get out without squealing, throw your head back as though you were going to be shaved, hold on to your false hair with both hands and then laugh till your soul gets thoroughly rested.
It ain't because lovers are so sensitive that they quarrel so often; it is because there is so much fun n the making up.
Vanity is a strange passion; rather than be out of a job it will brag of its vices.
There is no limit to the vanity of this world. Each spoke in the wheel thinks the whole strength of the wheel depends upon it.
And now the lads and lasses, following the example of the birds, bill and coo together.
Truth is the edict of God.
You cannot analyze a kiss any more than you can dissect the fragrance of flowers.
Rumor is a vagrant without a home, and lives upon what it can pick up.
Thrice is he armed that hath his quarrel just, But four times he who gets his blow in fust
Never run into debt, not if you can find anything else to run into.
Dr. Holmes says, both wittily and truly, that crying widows are easiest consoled.
Words are often seen hunting for an idea, but ideas are never seen hunting for words.
Theres not a lot of good humor in medicine, but theres a lot of medicine in good humor.
There's one good thing about tight shoes; they make you forget your other troubles.
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