You might be a redneck if you have to check in the bottom of your shoe for change so you can get Grandma a new plug of tobacco.
You might be a redneck if the tobacco chewers in your family aren't just men.
You might be a redneck if when you leave your house, you are followed by federal agents of the Bureau of Alcohol Tobacco and Firearms, and the only thing you worry about is if you can lose them or not.
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