Santa Claus Quotes - Page 5

• God put Santa Claus on earth to remind us that Christmas is 'sposed to be a happy time.

  Bil Keane

  Happy Times, Earth, Santa

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• Prayers never bring anything... They may bring solace to the sap, the bigot, the ignorant, the aboriginal, and the lazy - but to the enlightened it is the same as asking Santa Claus to bring you something for Xmas

  W. C. Fields

  Religious, Xmas, Prayer

  W. C. Fields, Ronald J. Fields (1973). “W. C. Fields by himself: his intended autobiography”, Prentice Hall

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• Maybe that whole love thing is just a grown-up version of Santa Claus; just a myth we've been fed since childhood. So, we keep buying magazines, joining clubs, and doing therapy and watching movies with hit pop songs played over love montages all in a pathetic attempt to explain why our love Santa keeps getting caught in the chimney.

  Meg Ryan

  Song, Childhood, Joining

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• Spirit and soul is horseshit of the worst sort. Obviously there are no fairies, no Santa Clauses, no spirits. What there is, is human goals and purposes as noted by sane existentialists. But a lot of transcendentalists are utter screwballs.

  Albert Ellis

  Goal, Soul, Purpose

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• I was Santa Claus in first year of primary school, our elementarys school play, because I had most panache, that was probably why. I was 5.

  James Frecheville

  School, Years, Play

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• What I have against religion is that they start you when you are so defenseless. I mean, I was three when they started pumping this bullshit into my head. I believed in Santa Claus and the Fairy Godmother, of course I believed in a virgin birth, and a guy lived in a whale, and a woman came from a rib. But then something happened that made me doubt all of it: I graduated sixth grade!

  Bill Maher

  Mean, Whales, Bullshit

  "Bill Maher: Victory Begins at Home". Documentary, Comedy, 2003.

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• Well when I was a kid, I asked Santa Claus for some toys. Santa Claus wrote me a letter that he lost his bag. He said he'd get back to me next year.

  Benicio Del Toro

  Kids, Years, Bags

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• Children are grateful when Santa Claus puts in their stockings gifts of toys or sweets. Could I not be grateful to Santa Claus when he put in my stockings the gift of two miraculous legs? We thank people for birthday presents of cigars and slippers. Can I thank no one for the birthday present of birth?

  Gilbert K. Chesterton

  Sweet, Children, Grateful

  Gilbert K. Chesterton (2013). “The Essential Gilbert K. Chesterton”, p.39, Simon and Schuster

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• He was a parade all by himself, a burst of dazzle and jingle, Santa Claus drinking his whiskey straight and groaning with a bellyache... Babe Ruth made the music that his joyous years danced to in a continuous party... What Babe Ruth is comes down, one generation handing it down to the next, as a nation heirloom.

  Jimmy Cannon

  Baseball, Party, Drinking

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• Besides, the mhis that surrounded the compound could scramble anything from GPS to Santa Claus.

  J.R. Ward

  Gps, Santa, Compounds

  J.R. Ward (2012). “Lover Reborn: A Novel of the Black Dagger Brotherhood”, p.226, Penguin

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• Being a superpower is like being a Santa Claus that everyone hates.

  Jon Stewart

  Hate, Santa, Superpower

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• Being a lifetime wife and mother has afforded me the luxury of having multiple careers: I've been a teacher. A chauffeur. A chef. An interior decorator. A landscape architect, as well as a gardener. I’ve been a painter. A personal shopper. An accountant and a banker. I’ve been a beautician. Santa Claus. The Tooth Fairy. A movie reviewer. A nurse. A psychologist. A negotiator. An I have a Ph. D in How to Pretend Like You Don’t Mind.

  Terry McMillan

  Mother, Teacher, Careers

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• How is Christmas regarded today? The legend of Santa Claus, the Christmas tree, the decorations of tinsel and mistletoe, and the giving of gifts all express to us the spirit of the day we celebrate; but the true spirit of Christmas lies much deeper than these. It is found in the life of the Savior, in the principles He taught, in His atoning sacrifice-which become our great heritage.

  Howard W. Hunter

  Lying, Sacrifice, Giving

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• A true bubble is when something is overvalued and intensely believed. Education may be the only thing people still believe in in the United States. To question education is really dangerous. It is the absolute taboo. It's like telling the world there's no Santa Claus.

  Peter Thiel

  Believe, Learning, People

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• If SANTA CLAUS came down the chimney in a f**king jogging suit, you wouldn't even know it was him.

  Wayne Coyne

  Kings, Suits You, Jogging

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• The rules your parents teach you to live by are very different than the rules the world actually runs by. Most of the conventional wisdom is not only wrong, it's a lie told to us by people who want to control us. It doesn't help us, it helps them. Pretty much everything we're told as children (and adults, really) by the established power structures in our lives are made up fairytales us to reinforce that control: Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, the tooth fairy, fat-free frozen dinners, religion, and metering lights on the highway--the list goes on

  Tucker Max

  Running, Easter, Children

  Tucker Max (2012). “Hilarity Ensues”, p.241, Simon and Schuster

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• The Grateful Dead were very kind. It was Santa Claus. It did good things. It allowed other people to benefit. The benefits that we played were enormous, and we played free. So you've got a band that loves to play free, and that was a wonderful thing.

  Mickey Hart

  Grateful, Play, People

  "Mickey Hart on the Grateful Dead: 'We Weren't a Girl Scouts Troop'". Interview with Benjy Eisen, www.rollingstone.com. April 16, 2012.

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• With big folks, either people think you look mean or it's more of a jolly Santa Claus, 'Oh, he's just a pudgy little teddy bear pillow.'

  The Notorious B.I.G.

  Mean, Thinking, People

  "Biography/Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

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• Physically he was the connoisseur's connoisseur. He was a giant panda, Santa Claus and the Jolly Green Giant rolled into one. On him, a lean and slender physique would have looked like very bad casting.

  Craig Claiborne

  Food, Cooking, Giants

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• Do some good to the ghetto, Mr. Kris Kringle.
  Come and stay awhile, kick it with God's Angels.
  Take and acknowledge my wisdom and understand
  That Santa Claus is a black man.

  Keith Murray

  Rap, Ghetto, Angel

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• If you can delude yourself by believing that there is some kind of Santa Claus out there who is going to bail you out in the end, then it will help you get through. Even if you are proven wrong in the end, you would have had a better life than a non-believer.

  Woody Allen

  Believe, Bail, Santa

  "Woody Allen's World: Whatever Works". Interview with Robert E. Lauder, www.commonwealmagazine.org. April 15, 2010.

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• I'm trying to get far away from [picturing God as] Gandalf or Santa Claus.

  William P. Young

  God, Trying, Santa

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• Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny should take a few pointers from the mutual-fund industry. All three are trying to pull off elaborate hoaxes. But while Santa and the bunny suffer the derision of eight year olds everywhere, actively-managed stock funds still have an ardent following among otherwise clear-thinking adults. This continued loyalty amazes me. Reams of statistics prove that most of the fund industry's stock pickers fail to beat the market.

  Jonathan Clements

  Loyalty, Easter, Thinking

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• When Tim Allen made The Santa Clause, I thought that was a delightful film. It took a modern sensibility but layered onto it a kind of sentiment.

  Leonard Maltin

  Sentimental, Santa, Kind

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• If Mitt Romney was Santa Claus, he would fire the reindeer and outsource the elves.

  Ted Strickland

  Fire, Santa, Reindeer

  FaceBook post by Ted Strickland from Sep 05, 2012

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