If he wants breakfast in bed, tell him to sleep in the kitchen.
Men think monogamy is something you make dining tables out of.
Why do men like intelligent women? Because opposites attract.
Teenagers are obviously God's punishment for having sex in the first place.
Women want to be treated as equals, not sequels.
Age to women is what kryptonite is to Superman. Inside every older woman is a younger woman screaming, 'Get me the hell outta here.'
Good art is in the wallet of the beholder.
People who say that money can't buy happiness just don't know where to shop.
living with a teenage daughter is like living with the Taliban a mum is not allowed to laugh, sing, dance or wear short skirts
It's a mystery of parenthood that your son can give mouth-to-mouth resuscitation to a stray, worm-riddled dog, share a piece of re-chewed gum from a kid with bronchitis and pick his nose and eat it on a regular basis, yet won't sit next to his sister because of 'Girl Germs'.
If the Nobel Prize was awarded by a woman, it would go to the inventor of the dimmer switch.
Any woman who calls herself a post-feminist should keep her Wonderbra and burn her brains.
I am allergic to domestic goddesses. Men would prefer a woman with a dirty mind to a clean house.
My sisters and I miss our dad dreadfully. But grief, of course, is the price of love.
Love is like a tide. When it's in, everything looks beautiful and inviting. Only when love recedes can you see the debris beneath the surface - the old bottles, the rusty prams, the sewage pipes, the bloated cats and dogs weighted down to drown. The man I had once loved so passionately I now saw as weak, gutted like a fish.
What creates a writer is huge, psychological dysfunction.
Basically it's just a whole bunch of blokes standing around scratching themselves
Well if manners maketh man make-up maketh woman.And we don't need a phalanx of behavioural scientists to explain why man judge women by their looks.Because the see bether than thay think.
Why can't women tell jokes? Because we marry them!
As a breastfeeding mother you are basically just meals on heels.
Anyone living in Los Angeles who says they don't need a psychiatrist, needs a psychiatrist.
The truth is, my experience in matters sexual is limited.
In Hollywood a romantic man is one who talks to you after sex.
Age to women is like Kryptonite to Superman.
I knew absolutely nothing about bondage. I'd always presumed it was just an inventive way of keeping your partner from going home.
Follow AzQuotes on Facebook, Twitter and Google+. Every day we present the best quotes! Improve yourself, find your inspiration, share with friends
or simply: