Aunt Quotes - Page 4

• It is no use telling me there are bad aunts and good aunts. At the core, they are all alike. Sooner or later, out pops the cloven hoof.

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Use, Jeeves, Pops

  The Code of the Woosters (1938) ch. 2

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• Anyone who has the temerity to write about Jane Austen is aware of [two] facts: first, that of all great writers she is the most difficult to catch in the act of greatness; second, that there are twenty-five elderly gentlemen living in the neighbourhood of London who resent any slight upon her genius as if it were an insult to the chastity of their aunts.

  Virginia Woolf

  Writing, Greatness, Elderly

  Virginia Woolf, Andrew McNeillie (1986). “The Essays of Virginia Woolf: 1925-1928”, Chatto & Windus

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• Despite everything my mom and doctor and dad have said to me about blame, I can't stop thinking what I know. And I know that my aunt Helen would still be alive today if she just bought me one present like everybody else. She would be alive if I were born on a day that didn't snow.

  Stephen Chbosky

  Mom, Dad, Thinking

  Stephen Chbosky (2013). “The Perks of Being a Wallflower YA edition”, p.91, Simon and Schuster

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• What I'm worrying about is what Tom is going to say when he starts talking." "Uncle Tom?" "I wish there was something else you could call him except 'Uncle Tom,' " Aunt Dahlia said a little testily. "Every time you do it, I expect to see him turn black and start playing the banjo.

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Uncles, Talking, Worry

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• Both the five-year-olds looked at me with bewilderment and a bit of fearful uncertainty. I had a sudden horrifying image of the woman I might become if I'm not careful: Crazy Aunt Liz. The divorcee in the muumuu with the dyed orange hair who doesn't eat dairy but smokes menthols, who's always just coming back from her astrology cruise or breaking up with her aroma-therapist boyfriend, who reads the Tarot cards of kindergarteners and says things like, "Bring Aunty Liz another wine cooler, baby, and I'll let you wear my mood ring.

  Elizabeth Gilbert

  Baby, Crazy, Wine

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• For a while he'd tried molding himself into the tragic Romantic hero, brooding and staring clench-jawed off into space as he composed dark verse in his head. But it turned out that trying to appear tragic in Incontinence, Indiana, was redundant, and his mother kept shouting at him and making him forget his rhymes. "Tommy, if you keep grinding your teeth like that, they'll wear away and you'll have to have dentures like Aunt Ester." Tommy only wished his beard was as heavy as Aunt Ester's---then he could stare out over the moors while he stroked it pensively.

  Christopher Moore

  Mother, Hero, Dark

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• my sweet old etcetera aunt lucy during the recent war could and what is more did tell you just what everybody was fighting for, my sister isabel created hundreds (and hundreds) of socks not to mention shirts fleaproof earwarmers etcetera wristers etcetera, my mother hoped that i would die etcetera bravely of course my father used to become hoarse talking about how it was a privilege and if only he could meanwhile my self etcetera lay quietly in the deep mud et cetera (dreaming, et cetera, of Your smile eyes knees and of your Etcetera)

  e. e. cummings

  Mother, Dream, Sweet

  e. e. cummings (2014). “100 Selected Poems”, p.25, Grove/Atlantic, Inc.

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• When you've learned to laugh at the things that should be laughed at, and not to laugh at those that shouldn't, you've got wisdom and understanding. -Aunt Jimsie

  Lucy Maud Montgomery

  Laughing, Understanding, Should

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• Sourmelina's secret (as Aunt Zo put it): 'Lina was one of those women they named the island after.

  Jeffrey Eugenides

  Islands, Secret

  Jeffrey Eugenides (2003). “Middlesex”, p.86, A&C Black

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• We'll be there, Harry," said Ron "What?" "At your Aunt and Uncle's house," said Ron, "And then we'll go with you wherever you're going." "No-" said Harry quickly; he hadn't counted on this, he had meant them to understand that he was undertaking the most dangerous journey alone. "You said it once before," said Hermione quickly, "that there was time to turn back if we wanted to. We've had time, haven't we? We're with you whatever happens.

  J. K. Rowling

  Uncles, Journey, House

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• I have a hundred-year-old aunt who aspires to sainthood, and whose only wish has been to go into the convent, but no congregation, not even the Little Sisters of Charity, could tolerate her for more than a few weeks, so the family has had to look after her. Believe me, there is nothing so insufferable as a saint, I wouldn't sic one on my worst enemy.

  Isabel Allende

  Believe, Worst Enemy, Years

  Isabel Allende (2003). “My invented country: a memoir”, HarperPerennial

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• Don’t talk like that, Dill,” said Aunt Alexandra. “It’s not becoming to a child. It’s – cynical.” “I ain’t cynical, Miss Alexandra. Tellin’ the truth’s not cynical, is it?” “The way you tell it, it is.

  Harper Lee

  Children, Cynical, Missing

  Harper Lee (1960). “TO KILL A MOCKINGBIRD”

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• ~When Valentina was not even 1 month old, my aunt [gave me the best advice]: 'Put her to sleep yourself every night. Sing to her and cradle her in your arms and sit by her side - every night. Because one day you won't be able to, and it's going to happen really fast.~

  Salma Hayek

  Sleep, Parenting, Night

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• One look at Rebecca and Aunt B would have an instant apoplexy. Raphael’s eyebrows furrowed. “My mother’s approval isn’t necessary.” Aha. “Does she know that?

  Ilona Andrews

  Mother, Eyebrows, Doe

  Ilona Andrews (2012). “Gunmetal Magic: A Novel in the World of Kate Daniels”, p.37, Penguin

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• Her aunt Sol had once told Shai to smile at the worst insults and snap at the minor ones. That way, no man would know your heart.

  Brandon Sanderson

  Heart, Men, Way

  Brandon Sanderson (2016). “Arcanum Unbounded: The Cosmere Collection”, p.36, Macmillan

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• Uncles and aunts, and cousins, are all very well, and fathers and mothers are not to be despised; but a grandmother, at holiday time, is worth them all.

  Fanny Fern

  Mother, Cousin, Uncles

  Fanny Fern (2016). “Folly as It Flies”, p.25, The Floating Press

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• My darling girl, when are you going to realize that being normal is not necessarily a virtue? It rather denotes a lack of courage." - Aunt Frances

  Alice Hoffman

  Girl, Magic, France

  FaceBook post by Alice Hoffman from Feb 16, 2016

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• In the high school classroom you are a drill sergent, a rabbi, a shoulder to cry on, a disciplinarian, a singer, a low-level scholar, a clerk, a referee, a clown, a counselor, a dress-code enforcer, a conductor, an apologist, a philosopher, a collaborator, a tap dancer, a politician, a therapist, a fool, a traffic cop, a priest, a mother-father-brother-sister-uncle-aunt, a bookeeper, a critic, a psychologist, the last straw.

  Frank McCourt

  Mother, Brother, Uncles

  Frank McCourt (2005). “Teacher Man: A Memoir”, p.19, Simon and Schuster

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• Aunt Mercy put down her tiles, one at a time. I-T-C-H-I-N. Aunt Grace leaned closer to the board, squinting. "Mercy Lynne, you're cheatin' again! What kinda word is that? Use it in a sentence." "I'm itchin' ta have some a that white cake." "That's not how you spell it." At least one of them could spell. Aunt Grace pulled one of the tiles off the board. "There's no T in itchin'." Or not.

  Margaret Stohl

  Cake, White, Squinting

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• Bunbury? Oh, he was quite exploded. Exploded! Was he the victim of a revolutionary outrage? I was not aware that Mr. Bunbury was interested in social legislation. If so, he is well punished for his morbidity. My dear Aunt Augusta, I mean he was found out! The doctors found out that Bunbury could not , that is what I mean—so Bunbury died. He seems to have had great confidence in the opinion of his physicians.

  Oscar Wilde

  Mean, Doctors, Physicians

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• Was she telling you to stay away from me?" I asked. He paused, then said, "Yeah." He squeezed my hand out of Aunt Lauren's sight. "It's okay. We're good." Chloe and Derek

  Kelley Armstrong

  Sight, Hands, Chloe

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• Nothing could convince Aunt Nelly to let Vlad stay home for the duration of the school year, which just goes to prove that parents and guardians don't care if they're sending you to face bloodthirsty monsters, so long as you get a B in English.

  Heather Brewer

  Home, School, Years

  Heather Brewer (2007). “The chronicles of Vladimir Tod: eighth grade bites”

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• My aunt and overprivileged cousin only recognize two states of being: glitter and grunge. And if you weren’t glitter, well, that only left one other option.

  Rachel Vincent

  Cousin, Two, Glitter

  Rachel Vincent (2009). “My Soul to Take”, p.30, Harlequin

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• I was under the impression that I warned you that in London country ways will not do, Frederica!” “You did!” she retorted. “And although I can’t say that I paid much heed to your advice it so happens that I am accompanied today by my aunt!” “Who adds invisibility to her other accomplishments!

  Georgette Heyer

  Country, Accomplishment, Advice

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• That evening, Dudley paraded around the living room for the family in his brand new uniform...As he looked at Dudley in his new knickerbockers, Uncle Vernon said gruffly that if was the proudest moment of his life. Aunt Petunia burst into tears and said she couldn't believe it was her Ickle Dudleykins, he looked so handsome and grown-up. Harry didn't trust himself to speak. He thought two of his ribs might already have cracked from trying not to laugh.

  J. K. Rowling

  Uncles, Believe, Two

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