Jerk Quotes - Page 2

• 

  Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?

  George Carlin

  Inspirational, Funny, Life

  "Carlin on Campus". Documentary, Comedy, 1984.

  1855 Copy quote

  Show source

• I'm not afraid to be a jerk or anything and laugh at myself anymore.

  Mike Tyson

  Laughing, Not Afraid

  Source: collider.com

  7 Copy quote

  Show source

• That's the problem with having a moral code. We want to destroy the jerkish part of the jerks, but we want to save the human being underneath.

  David Levithan

  Want, Moral, Problem

  Andrea Cremer, David Levithan (2013). “Invisibility”, p.173, Penguin

  4 Copy quote

  Show source

• In the history of the world many souls have been, are, and will be, and with a little reflection this is marvelous and not depressing. Many jerks are made gloomy about it, for they think quantity buries them alive. That's just crazy. Numbers are very dangerous, but the main thing about them is that they humble your pride. And that's good.

  Saul Bellow

  Depressing, Crazy, Humble

  5 Copy quote

• Don't be a jerk. Try to love everyone. Give more than you take. And do it despite the fact that you only really like about seven out of 500 people.

  Judd Apatow

  People, Giving, Trying

  52 Copy quote

• Success is not about money and power. Real success is about relationships. There's no point in making $50 million a year if your teenager thinks you're a jerk and you spend no time with your wife.

  Christopher Reeve

  Real, Teenager, Thinking

  10 Copy quote

• Small jerks began to appear in my legs, my walk became unsteady precisely because I wanted it to be smooth.

  Knut Hamsun

  Legs, Smooth, Walks

  Knut Hamsun (2008). “Hunger: A Novel”, p.25, Macmillan

  4 Copy quote

  Show source

• It's music rage, which is like road rage, only more righteous. When you get road rage, a tiny part of you knows you're being a jerk, but when you get music rage, you're carrying out the will of God, and God wants these people dead.

  Nick Hornby

  People, Tiny, Want

  "A Long Way Down". Book by Nick Hornby, June 7, 2005.

  4 Copy quote

  Show source

• Kiefer Sutherland is a crazy jerk on '24,' but you love him because he gets the job done. And I think that that goes for a lot of action stars, I mean Steven Segal is a jerk, but you want to watch him because, eventually, he's a jerk who can beat up bad people.

  Paul Scheer

  Jobs, Stars, Crazy

  "Interview: Paul Scheer Gets Back In Action On The Second Season Of 'NTSF:SD:SUV'". Interview with Charles Webb, www.mtv.com. August 9, 2012.

  4 Copy quote

  Show source

• Last, but not least -- in fact, this is most important -- you need a happy ending. However, if you can create tragic situations and jerk a few tears before the happy ending, it will work much better.

  Satyajit Ray

  Important, Tears, Facts

  Satyajit Ray (2004). “Complete Adventures of Feluda”, p.575, Penguin Books India

  27 Copy quote

  Show source

• I've found that the people who play villains are the nicest people in the world and people who play heroes are jerks.

  Tim Burton

  Hero, Play, People

  Interview with Mark Kermode, www.theguardian.com. January 5, 2000.

  19 Copy quote

  Show source

• I'm a jerk, that's who I am. I'm like everybody else.

  Larry David

  Who I Am

  "Who is Larry David?". "60 MInutes" with Charlie Rose, www.cbsnews.com. May 31, 2015.

  12 Copy quote

  Show source

• I could be a jerk and get a lot more publicity, but that's not who I am.

  Pete Sampras

  Who I Am, Publicity

  Biography/Personal Quotes, www.imdb.com.

  7 Copy quote

  Show source

• I'm not gay, but I'm still the kind of guy where, even though you have no chance, they still want to hang around me so you can get a good mental image and jerk off to me later.

  Zach Braff

  Gay, Guy, Good Man

  4 Copy quote

• Every day when I get home from work, I feel so frustrated, my boss is a jerk.

  Todd Rundgren

  Work, Home, Boss

  7 Copy quote

• People who go broke in a big way never miss any meals. It is the poor jerk who is shy a half slug who must tighten his belt.

  Robert A. Heinlein

  People, Missing, Slugs

  Robert A. Heinlein (1987). “Time Enough for Love”, p.231, Penguin

  4 Copy quote

  Show source

• You can't be a good person when you're writing and a bad person to your husband or a bad friend. You can't be a jerk in order to be a good writer. You can't say, "I'm too busy writing to be political." You are one person. You are the same person in every aspect of your life, and you have to be a responsible person in every aspect of your life.

  Ann Patchett

  Husband, Writing, Political

  Source: www.guernicamag.com

  6 Copy quote

  Show source

• Can I tell you what I want? I want to stop wanting things I can’t have. I want to stop falling for jerks I don’t need. And I want to stop feeling like an f/ing gooey butter cake somebody left out in the rain.

  Kate Klise

  Rain, Fall, Cake

  4 Copy quote

• I am always the 'good guy,' and I take on the idiotic jerks of the nation.

  Wally George

  Guy, Idiotic, Nations

  Wally George (1999). “Wally George: The Father of Combat TV”, Seven Locks Press

  7 Copy quote

  Show source

• I must of woke up this morning with a bug up my ass, I think I'll just haul off and belt the next jerk that I pass.

  Todd Rundgren

  Morning, Work, Thinking

  10 Copy quote

• Elections are a Western jerk-off.

  John le Carre

  Election, Western

  "The Mission Song". Book by John le Carre, 2006.

  6 Copy quote

  Show source

• Since the only way you are going to find solutions to painful problems is by thinking deeply about them - i.e., reflecting - if you can develop a knee-jerk reaction to pain that is to reflect rather than to fight or flee, it will lead to your rapid learning/evolving.

  Ray Dalio

  Life, Pain, Fighting

  6 Copy quote

• If the Police could do a reunion... One of the biggest jerks I ever met was Sting. If he can do it, then anyone can do it. It's not that big a deal. And the Eagles! They did it! They severely hated each other. It's just rock and roll

  Steven Adler

  Rocks, Eagles, Rock And Roll

  11 Copy quote

• It's about time trees were good for something, instead of just standing there like jerks!

  Homer

  Tree, Standing There, Standing

  4 Copy quote

• Public transportation is for jerks and lesbians.

  Matt Groening

  Transportation, Public Transportation

  56 Copy quote