One Liner Quotes - Page 3

• [Arnold Schwarzenegger] is funny. Some great one-liners, some great banter between him and the contestants [on "The Apprentice" ]. And he's good!

  Boy George

  Schwarzenegger, Banter, Great Ones

  Source: www.washingtontimes.com

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• People are clever, but almost no one ever devises an optimal quip precisely at the needed moment. Therefore, virtually all great one-liners are later inventions - words that people wished they had spouted, but failed to manufacture at the truly opportune instant.

  Stephen Jay Gould

  Clever, People, Moments

  Stephen Jay Gould (1995). “Dinosaur in a haystack: reflections in natural history”, Harmony

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• It occurs to me that John McCain is as intellectually shallow as our current President....Bush goes bumbling along, grinning and spewing moronic one-liners, as though nobody understands what a colossal failure he has been....I fear to the depth of my being that John McCain is just like him.

  Jack Cafferty

  President, Depth, Shallow

  "Current Wisdom", spectator.org. August 19, 2008.

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• The one-liner of this movie [ The Hollars], you've probably heard before: 'A guy goes home to his family and finds out about himself.

  John Krasinski

  Home, Guy, Heard

  "John Krasinski Is Looking To Push The Limits In Hollywood". Interview with Leigh Blickley, www.huffingtonpost.com. January 29, 2016.

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• I can't compete with the Michael Bays of the world in regard to special effects and that kind of stuff. But you can compete in the dialogue and the one liners and the original characterisations and I think that's what people are responding to.

  John Michael McDonagh

  Thinking, People, Special

  Source: www.indielondon.co.uk

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• I'm in awe of comedians that do things that I can't do, whether it be a one-liner comic like Anthony Jeselnik, whether it be social issues commentary, whether it be - hell, Carrot Top. I can't be Carrot Top. I can't.

  Brad Williams

  Issues, Comedian, Hell

  Source: thecelebritycafe.com

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• No, and in fact I get a bit frustrated, because I'm actually quite good at one-liners, and I've had hundreds of them over the years, and they sink without trace, and I get very frustrated. Every party conference I really work on the speeches, and I always have two or three things I'm quite proud of, and no one ever remembers them.

  Vince Cable

  Party, Years, Two

  "Vince Cable: 'What we're managing is quite a difficult situation'" by Decca Aitkenhead, www.theguardian.com. August 9, 2010.

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• I'm no good at the one-liner thing. It's just not me.

  Jamie Bell

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• Nietzsche had a little one-liner on how to choose a wife. He said, ''Are you willing to have a conversation with this woman for the next forty years?'' That's how to pick a wife.

  Kurt Vonnegut

  Years, Wife, Littles

  Kurt Vonnegut (2011). “Kurt Vonnegut: The Last Interview: And Other Conversations”, p.104, Melville House

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• Mike Myers as Austin Powers makes me laugh - that was genius - and Daffy Duck makes me laugh, but I like odd behavior. I don't like hip dialogue and one-liners and all that sort of cool, sophomoric comedy. It's just not for me.

  Nicolas Cage

  Ducks, Laughing, Daffy Duck

  "Biography / Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

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• I like showing different types of comedy - showing that I could tell a story, or showing that I could do a one-liner, showing I could do stuff about music - so just trying to be versatile and talking about different topics.

  Hannibal Buress

  Talking, Trying, Different

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• Todd Glass has amazing energy on stage. Dave Attell is one of my favorites because he's a one liner comic who is always incredibly in the moment with the audience. As for newer people, I think Adrienne Iapalucci writes some great, dark jokes and Sean Patton has a hilarious voice on stage.

  Anthony Jeselnik

  Writing, Dark, Thinking

  "Comedian Anthony Jeselnik: “He’s The Best!” -Everybody". Interview With David Dean, www.serialoptimist.com. November 29, 2010.

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• I think of myself as a theatre comic instead of club comic because I tend to talk for a bit before I start being funny. I don't really do the one-liners and five second bits or whatever. But it's good to work stuff out sometimes.

  Dylan Moran

  Thinking, Theatre, Clubs

  Source: brightestyoungthings.com

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• Donald Trump is great at the one-liners, but he's a chaos candidate and he'd be a chaos president. He would not be the commander in chief we need to keep our country safe.

  Renee Montagne

  Country, President, Needs

  "Breaking down the GOP presidential debate" by Adam C. Smith, Alex Leary, www.tampabay.com. December 16, 2015.

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• I have hundreds of Word documents filled with pages of one-liners. If I begin to write a story, or if one of my thoughts leads to more than a couple paragraphs of writing, I'll go into these documents and pull out lines that I think would work with it.

  Chelsea Martin

  Couple, Writing, Thinking

  Source: therumpus.net

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• Sometimes it bursts from your imagination fully formed, sometimes you absorb from nonfiction, sometimes you're able to imprint your own autobiographical experiences on a world you never yourself were a part of. A decent number of the one-liners in the title story originally came up in conversations with my girlfriend or my neighbor.

  Anthony Marra

  Girlfriend, Numbers, Imagination

  Source: therumpus.net

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• Donald [Trump], is great at - at the one-liners, but he's a chaos candidate.

  Jeb Bush

  Chaos, Trump, Candidates

  "Rush Transcript second debate: CNN Facebook Republican Presidential Debate". cnnpressroom.blogs.cnn.com. December 16, 2015.

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• The actors come in and they make characters their own and so Patrick and I have never been the kind to think that our script is the bible. We want to make sure that the story is told, that you stick to the story but if you have to make changes to the character then that's fine. A lot of times there are some funny one-liners, funny things that happen that are out of the ordinary. I like it.

  Todd Farmer

  Character, Thinking, Funny Things

  Source: collider.com

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• I think Twitter is kind of fun, it's not deep and it never will be, but it's a great way to communicate one-liners and to sort of see what people are laughing about. It's a terrific source of misinformation.

  Dave Barry

  Fun, Thinking, Laughing

  Source: www.writersdigest.com

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• I do longer runs on things, a lot stories. I really like one-liners, I like a lot of different kinds of standup but I've always been long-winded.

  John Mulaney

  Running, Long, Different

  Source: laist.com

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• President Reagan's one-liners were terrific.

  Geraldine Ferraro

  President, President Reagan, Terrific

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• What a shame to be so afraid of failure that you stop living. My wife has a great one-liner about failure: "Never consider yourself a failure-you can always serve as a bad example." She is right. Failure can be a better teacher than success.

  Bernie Siegel

  Teacher, Failure, Wife

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• If I had that kind of money, I wouldn't come to Vietnam, I'd send for it.

  Bob Hope

  Vietnam, One Line, Kind

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• I need money. I have a staff of 30, and four houses, never mind the government, to support.

  Bob Hope

  Government, House, Support

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• Evangelical agencies with ready funding may have too little depth and vision to cope with the current conflict. God's kingdom is built not on perpetual motion, one-liners, and flashbulbs but on Christ.

  Carl F. H. Henry

  Agency, Vision, Depth

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