Scott Adams Quotes - Page 11

Quotes about:

• I'm predicting that we'll finally have a computer will search my e-mail automatically and delete every message that begins with 'thought you'd be interested,' and then give an electrical shock to the sender to remind him or her to stop send that kind of message.

  Scott Adams

  Giving, Mail, Messages

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• He was deader than a shrunken head at a Hackey Sack festival.

  Scott Adams

  Death, Suicide, Festivals

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• 'Dilbert' became popular during the downsizing of the '90s, and job security was a major theme of the strip.

  Scott Adams

  Jobs, Dilbert, Theme

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• I've always defined myself not as a cartoonist , but as an entrepreneur. That was true before I tried cartooning. I always imagined cartooning would be how I got my seed capital. I always thought my other businesses would be the less dominant part of my life.

  Scott Adams

  Entrepreneur, Would Be, Cartoonist

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• Be careful that what you write does not offend anybody or cause problems within the company. The safest approach is to remove all useful information.

  Scott Adams

  Writing, Decision, Doe

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• Management is nature's way of removing idiots from the productive flow.

  Scott Adams

  Wisdom, Flow, Way

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• As a fan, I'm distraught, but as a cartoonist looking at new vacant spaces in 2400 newspapers, well, behind me, my cats are dancing a conga line.

  Scott Adams

  Funny, Humor, Cat

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• Dilbert: You joined the "Flat Earth Society?" Dogbert: I believe the earth must be flat. There is no good evidence to support the so-called "round earth theory." Dilbert: I think Christopher Columbus would disagree. Dogbert: How convenient that your best witness is dead.

  Scott Adams

  Believe, Science, Thinking

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• Dogbert: So, Since Columbus is dead, you have no evidence that the earth is round. Dilbert: Look. You can Ask Senator John Glenn. He orbited the earth when he was an astronaut. Dogbert: So, your theory depends on the honesty of politicians. Dilbert: Yes... no, wait.

  Scott Adams

  Honesty, Science, Waiting

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• Computers and rocket ships are examples of invention, not of understanding. ... All that is needed to build machines is the knowledge that when one thing happens, another thing happens as a result. It's an accumulation of simple patterns. A dog can learn patterns. There is no "why&rdqo"; in those examples. We don't understand why electricity travels. We don't know why light travels at a constant speed forever. All we can do is observe and record patterns.

  Scott Adams

  Dog, Knowledge, Science

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• A person with a flexible schedule and average resources will be happier than a rich person who has everything except a flexible schedule. Step one in your search for happiness is to continually work toward having control of your schedule.

  Scott Adams

  Average, Investing, Schedules

  "How to Fail at Almost Everything and Still Win Big". Book by Scott Adams, www.huffingtonpost.com. 2013.

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• You might think the word "homemade" is just a word we use as a marketing ploy. But what you don't realize is that the staff sleeps here at night. If your tablecloth is wrinkled, that's why.

  Scott Adams

  Sleep, Night, Thinking

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• I'm not happy on vacation. In those rare times when I have three hours with no work I have to do, I'm terribly uncomfortable.

  Scott Adams

  Vacation, Three, Not Happy

  "Scott Adams Keeps the Home Office Humming". Interview with Adam Bryant, www.nytimes.com. September 7, 1997.

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• As network administrator I can take down the network with one keystroke. It's just like being a doctor but without getting gooky stuff on my paws.

  Scott Adams

  Technology, Doctors, Paws

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• When times are bad, the gloves come off and employers are less nice. People become disposable.

  Scott Adams

  Nice, People, Gloves

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• There's a gigantic gray area between good moral behavior and outright felonious activities. I call that the Weasel Zone and it's where most of life happens.

  Scott Adams

  Moral Behavior, Life Happens, Gray Area

  "Dilbert and the Way of the Weasel". Book by Scott Adams, 2002.

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• It is better for your career to do nothing, than to do something and attract criticism.

  Scott Adams

  Careers, Criticism

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