I don't feel old. I feel like a young man that has something wrong with him.
If your parents never had children, chances are... neither will you.
There's so much comedy on television. Does that cause comedy in the streets?
As long as people will accept crap, it will be financially profitable to dispense it.
Just think of all the billions of coincidences that don't happen.
It's a rare person who wants to hear what he doesn't want to hear.
Lawyers work hard and, like us, they're human, many of them.
Music bypasses the brain and goes straight to the heart. I wish my life had more of it.
I think we live in an age of increasing mediocrity.
I eat at this German-Chinese restaurant and the food is delicious. The only problem is that an hour later you're hungry for power.
Sloppy language leads to sloppy thought, and sloppy thought to sloppy legislation.
Censorship feeds the dirty mind more than the four-letter word itself.
Radio, which was a much better medium than television will ever be, was easy and pleasant to listen to. Your mind filled automatically with images.
I don't see the future as bright, language-wise. I see it as a glass half empty - and evaporating quickly.
Why are sex and violence always linked? I'm afraid they'll blur together in people's minds - sexandviolence - until we can't tell them apart. I expect to hear a newscaster say, "The mob became unruly and the police were forced to resort to sex."
Teaching is an art and a profession requiring years of training.
Great humorists are great insulters.
Depression - it falls into that small category of things like combat that, if you haven't been in it, you can say you can imagine it all you like. But it's truly different.
Home schooling as an idea is on a par with home dentistry.
The idea that hunting is one against one is ludicrous. It's one animal versus the hunter, the manufacturer of the rifle, the bullet maker, the designer and manufacturer of the telescopic sight, the auto manufacturer who made the car the hunter got to the edge of the wild in, the maker of his waterproof shoes, the various manufacturers of his mittens, glasses, overcoat - and that's only the beginning of the list. The "sportsman" who shoots an animal should then make a speech, like the actor who wins an Oscar does, thanking the multitudes behind the scenes who made this "victory" possible.
I am always shocked that there are still a handful of defenders of the dubious practice of abstinence, surely the worst idea since chocolate-covered ants.
In relative youth, we assume we'll remember everything. Someone should urge the young to think otherwise.
My IQ is somewhere between Spiro Agnew's and Albert Einstein's.
Can you picture yourself at the age 60 doing what you do now?
It's not always easy to identify your own voice. It comes with time.
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