Forks Quotes - Page 8

• I'll tell you what I like about Chinese people: they're hanging in there with the chop sticks, aren't they? You know they've seen the fork. They're staying with the sticks.

  Jerry Seinfeld

  Funny, People, Chinese

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• Acceptable rules of conduct were suspended when it came to the spoon shortage. The deficit had gotten so bad that prices were all but unaffordable, and dynastic spoon succession had become a matter of considerable interest. Spoons were even postcode engraved and carried on one's person to eliminate theft, and good table manners, one of the eight pillars upon which the Collective was built, had been relaxed to allow tea to be stirred - shockingly - with the handle of a fork.

  Jasper Fforde

  Eight, Tea, Pillars

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• Now I know what a piece of bacon feels like when it is suddenly picked out of the pan on a fork and put back on the shelf!" "No you don't!" he heard Dori answering, "because the bacon knows that it will get back in the pan sooner or later; and it is to be hoped we shan't. Also eagles aren't forks!

  J. R. R. Tolkien

  Eagles, Pieces, Shelves

  J. R. R. Tolkien, John Ronald Reuel Tolkien (1982). “The Hobbit Or There and Back Again”, Del Rey

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• What on earth is modern exegesis up to? Oh, little lazy one! Some red wine and up! Off you go, brandishing your fork, stripped of Ophelia's useless ornaments, fire in your large nostrils, out to rake the muck of metaphors.

  Louis Aragon

  Wine, Fire, Lazy

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• I’d like to see a forklift lift a crate of forks. It’d be so damn literal! You are using that machine to it’s exact purpose!

  Mitch Hedberg

  Purpose, Machines, Damn

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• A broken spoon may be a fork in disguise.

  Stephen King

  Broken, Spoons, May

  Stephen King (2007). “Everything's Eventual: 14 Dark Tales”, p.269, Simon and Schuster

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• Scientists have determined that the most irritating sound to the human ear is the sound of a knife cutting a glass bottle. And the second-worst sound is a fork scratching a glass bottle. Evidently they did all their research at the Picnic for Morons.

  Peter Sagal

  Funny, Cutting, Science

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• Eating soup with a fork: slow and messy.

  Peter Schoomaker

  Soup, Eating, Messy

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• You do not sew with a fork and I see no reason why you should eat with knitting needles.

  Henry Beard

  Food, Knitting, Cooking

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• It's really crucial to achieve that balance with a film like this, cause it is unique and witty and then there's the tendency to force that. It becomes contrived and I know the feeling like, give me a fork that I can stab in my eye in those kinds of movies.

  Ellen Page

  Witty, Eye, Unique

  "Juno's Ellen Page and Michael Cera". Roundtable Interview, movieweb.com. June 12, 2007.

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• Heaven answers with us the same purpose that the tuning-fork does with musicians. Our affections, the whole orchestra of them, are apt to get below the concert-pitch; and we take heaven to tune our hearts by.

  Henry Ward Beecher

  Heart, Heaven, Musician

  Henry Ward Beecher (1870). “Familiar Talks on Themes of General Christian Experience”, p.262

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• Every comedian comes to a fork in the road where they have to decide if they're going to make jokes about other people or make jokes about themselves. I chose myself.

  Mike Birbiglia

  People, Comedian, Fork In The Road

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• As you go through life, there are thousands of little forks in the road, and there are a few really big forks-those moments of reckoning, moments of truth.

  Lee Iacocca

  Fate, Littles, Moments

  Lee Iacocca, William Novak (2011). “Iacocca: An Autobiography”, p.16, Bantam

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• This brief century of ours is arguably the most significant one in the history of our universe. We'll have the technology either to self-destruct, or [to] seed our cosmos with life. The situation is so unstable that I doubt we can dwell at this fork in the road for more than another hundred years. But if we end up going the life route instead of the death route, then in a distant future our cosmos will be teaming with life, all of which can be traced back to what we do-here and now. I don't know how we'll be thought of, but I'm sure that we won't be remembered as insignificant.

  Max Tegmark

  Moon, Technology, Self

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• For a smart material to be able to send out a more complex signal it needs to be nonlinear. If you hit a tuning fork twice as hard it will ring twice as loud but still at the same frequency. That's a linear response. If you hit a person twice as hard they're unlikely just to shout twice as loud. That property lets you learn more about the person than the tuning fork.

  Neil Gershenfeld

  Smart, Technology, Needs

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• The fork is the most powerful tool ever placed in our hands.

  John Robbins

  Powerful, Philosophy, Hands

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• I have a mantra in my head that there will always be another meal. I can put my fork down, knowing there will be good things in my future!

  Gail Simmons

  Knowing, Meals, Good Things

  "Gail Simmons Dishes on Top Chef and More". Interview with Emily Hebert, www.elle.com. April 29, 2011.

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• Can you have more than one major MISSION pervading your life? NO. That would be like coming to a fork in the road and trying to go both ways by straddling it.

  Charles Garfield

  Trying, Would Be, Way

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• I'm a magician. I've learned to do some really cool tricks like levitating myself and melting forks.

  Blake Michael

  Melting, I've Learned, Really Cool

  "Meet the Cast of Lemonade Mouth!" by Neha Gandhi, www.seventeen.com. April 13, 2011.

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• Objects of Appreciation: Every time you go to use a utensil or instrument, take pleasure and feel gratitude for the fact that you have such an object available. If you focus on this, you'll be able to be lifted many many times each day. Some common examples include: a pen, fork, cup, key, computers, clock, chair, stapler, and eyeglasses.

  Zelig Pliskin

  Gratitude, Appreciation, Eyeglasses

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• At a certain fork in the road of automatization, Europeans chose to have more time, and they work far less than we do and get much longer vacations. We chose to have more stuff, the stuff sold to us through those beckoning adjectives-bigger, better, faster: Jet Skis, extra cars, second homes, motor homes, towering slab TVs, if not the time to enjoy them or to enjoy less commodified pleasures.

  Rebecca Solnit

  Home, Vacation, Car

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• It?s a beautiful descent in a 737, into the Bitterroot Valley, following the Clark Fork River, on a perfect golden autumn day .

  Garrison Keillor

  Beautiful, Autumn, Rivers

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• So I dipped into my childhood and came up with Nicky Deuce. I wanted him to get into a lot of mischief, like the time I taped a fork to a broom handle and cattle-rustled a steak off the barbecue of the next-door neighbor.

  Steve Schirripa

  Doors, Childhood, Deuces

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• I was forced to go to Cotillion when I was in seventh grade. So I learned what fork is what and dance steps.

  Chris Black

  Cotillion, Steps, Grades

  Source: www.interviewmagazine.com

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• The only exercise I got as a kid was fork to mouth. Food was equated with love in my household. I thought you left the table when the zipper was down and you'd explode if you took another bite. I'd eat my plate and then everyone else's leftovers.

  Paul Stanley

  Kids, Exercise, Zippers

  "Paul Stanley, from 'chunky' kid to fit KISS rocker". Interview with James S. Fell, beta.latimes.com. April 20, 2013.

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