Funny Aging Quotes - Page 3

At age 20, we worry about what others think of us. At age 40, we don't care what they think of us. At age 60, we discover they haven't been thinking of us at all.

Ann Landers

Funny, Uplifting, Retirement

134 Copy quote
You know you're getting old when all the names in your black book have M. D. after them.

Harrison Ford

Birthday, Fun, Book

10 Copy quote
A man is not old until regrets take the place of dreams.

John Barrymore

Love, Inspirational, Life

"Biography/ Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

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The best way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once.

Herbert V. Prochnow

Love, Funny, Relationship

Herbert V. Prochnow (1994). “1000 Stories and Illustrations for All Occasions”, Baker Publishing Group

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Age is not important unless you're a cheese.

Helen Hayes

Birthday, Age, Important

17 Copy quote
A man ninety years old was asked to what he attributed his longevity. I reckon, he said, with a twinkle in his eye, it because most nights I went to bed and slept when I should have sat up and worried.

Dorothea Kent

Funny, Eye, Men

13 Copy quote
How old would you be if you didn't know how old you are?

Satchel Paige

Happy Birthday, Baseball, Fun

Quoted in Garson Kanin, It Takes a Long Time to Become Young (1978)

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I don't know how I got over the hill without getting to the top.

Will Rogers

Getting Older, Hills, Over The Hill

20 Copy quote
You'll live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that make you want to.

Woody Allen

Funny, Birthday, Witty

"Fictional character: Pearl". "Interiors", www.imdb.com. 1978.

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We are always the same age inside.

Gertrude Stein

Happy Birthday, Confidence, Positive Thinking

"The American Treasury, 1455-1955". Book edited by Clifton Fadiman, p. 946, 1955.

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Age is just a number. It's totally irrelevant unless, of course, you happen to be a bottle of wine.

Joan Collins

Funny, Birthday, Wine

81 Copy quote
None are so old as those who have outlived enthusiasm.

Henry David Thoreau

Inspirational, Life, Birthday

Henry David Thoreau (2015). “Thoreau on Nature: Sage Words on Finding Harmony with the Natural World”, p.40, Skyhorse Publishing, Inc.

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By the time you're eighty years old you've learned everything. You only have to remember it.

Bill Vaughan

Funny, Witty, Elderly

27 Copy quote
To know how to grow old is the master work of wisdom, and one of the most difficult chapters in the great art of living.

Herman Melville

Life, Birthday, Time

26 Copy quote
At 50, don't let aging get you down. It's too hard to get back up. Happy 50th birthday.

H. H. Asquith

Birthday, Getting Older, Age

19 Copy quote
To keep the heart unwrinkled, to be hopeful, kindly, cheerful, reverent that is to triumph over old age.

Thomas Bailey Aldrich

Birthday, Hope, Heart

Thomas Bailey Aldrich (1907). “Ponkapog papers, A sea turn, and other matters”

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Live as long as you may, the first twenty years are the longest half of your life.

Robert Southey

Funny Birthday, Years, Long

'The Doctor' (1812) ch. 130

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Thirty was so strange for me. I've really had to come to terms with the fact that I am now a walking and talking adult.

C. S. Lewis

Birthday, Talking, Age

67 Copy quote
The older I get, the better I was.

Van Dyke Parks

Wine, Golf, Age

Biography/Personal Quotes, www.imdb.com.

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You know you're getting old when everything hurts. And what doesn't hurt doesn't work.

Hy Gardner

Funny, Sarcastic, Hurt

46 Copy quote
Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle.

Bob Hope

Birthday, Witty, Funny Inspirational

31 Copy quote
You can only perceive real beauty in a person as they get older.

Anouk Aimee

Beauty, Real, Elderly

Biography/Personal Quotes, www.imdb.com.

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Nature gives you the face you have at twenty; it is up to you to merit the face you have at fifty.

Coco Chanel

Funny, Birthday, Beauty

31 Copy quote
Middle age is the time when a man is always thinking that in a week or two he will feel as good as ever.

Don Marquis

Funny, Birthday, Time

16 Copy quote
Old age is like a plane flying through a storm. Once you're aboard, there's nothing you can do.

Golda Meir

Funny, Birthday, Women

"Biography/Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

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