Funny Being Single Quotes

I'm single because I was born that way.

Mae West

Sarcastic, Witty, Freedom

Mae West (1967). “The wit and wisdom of Mae West”

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Being single is pretty good. It's a nice sense of irresponsibility.

Michael Douglas

Single, Nice, Happy Valentines Day

38 Copy quote
I don't like to be labeled as lonely just because I am alone.

Delta Burke

Single, Lonely, Being Alone

"5 Things to Love About Being Single" by Whitney Caudill, www.huffingtonpost.com. May 23, 2013.

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Some people are settling down, some people are settling and some people refuse to settle for anything less than butterflies.

Candace Bushnell

Love, Single, Butterfly

89 Copy quote
I'm dating a woman now who, evidently, is unaware of it.

Garry Shandling

Valentines Day, Single, Funny Love

8 Copy quote
Being single doesn't necessarily mean you're available. Sometimes you have to put up a sign that says "Do Not Disturb" on your heart.

Wiz Khalifa

Single, Heart, Mean

38 Copy quote
Maybe some women aren't meant to be tamed. Maybe they just need to run free until they find someone just as wild to run with them. -Carrie Bradshaw

Candace Bushnell

Running, Women, Being Single

60 Copy quote
Marriage is the only adventure open to the cowardly.

Voltaire

Marriage, Humorous, Being Single

31 Copy quote
I love being single. It's almost like being rich.

Sue Grafton

Single, Rich, Being Single

Sue Grafton (2011). “D is for Deadbeat”, p.17, Pan Macmillan

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I have stepped off the relationship scene to come to terms with myself. I have spent most of my adult life being 'someone's girlfriend', and now I am happy being single.

Penelope Cruz

Being Happy, Girlfriend, Being Single

7 Copy quote
I must learn to love the fool in me the one who feels too much, talks too much, takes too many chances, wins sometimes and loses often, lacks self-control, loves and hates, hurts and gets hurt, promises and breaks promises, laughs and cries.

Theodore Isaac Rubin

Single, Hurt, Hate

42 Copy quote
Today is Valentine's Day - or, as men like to call it, Extortion Day!

Jay Leno

Funny, Romantic, Valentines Day

97 Copy quote
To be exempt from the passions with which others are tormented, is the only pleasing solitude.

Joseph Addison

Single, Passion, Pleasing Others

Joseph Addison, Sir Richard Steele (1853). “The Spectator”, p.100

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You do not need to be loved, not at the cost of yourself. Of all the people you will know in the lifetime, you are the only one you will never leave or lose.

Jo Coudert

Self Esteem, Being Single, People

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By persistently remaining single a man converts himself into a permanent public temptation.

Oscar Wilde

Anniversary, Single, Funny Valentines Day

Oscar Wilde (2012). “The Wit and Humor of Oscar Wilde”, p.32, Courier Corporation

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He is his own best friend and takes delight in privacy whereas the man of no virtue or ability is his own worst enemy and is afraid of solitude.

Aristotle

Single, Men, Worst Enemy

20 Copy quote
I celebrate myself, and sing myself.

Walt Whitman

Sad, Appreciation, Inspirational Life

"Song of Myself " l. 1 (written 1855)

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I never found a companion that was so companionable as solitude.

Henry David Thoreau

Music, Loneliness, Being Single

Henry David Thoreau (2015). “Thoreau on Nature: Sage Words on Finding Harmony with the Natural World”, p.29, Skyhorse Publishing, Inc.

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You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself in any direction you choose. You're on your own, and you know what you know. And you are the guy who'll decide where to go.

Dr. Seuss

Life, Graduation, Confidence

Theodor Seuss Geisel, “Oh, The Places You'll Go”

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Love is only a dirty trick played on us to achieve continuation of the species.

W. Somerset Maugham

Love, Sarcastic, Depressing

81 Copy quote
I love being single. I can come and go as I please and stay out as late as I want to.

Eric Dickerson

Being Single, Being Alone, Love Is

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Being single used to mean that nobody wanted you. Now it means you're pretty sexy and you're taking your time deciding how you want your life to be and who you want to spend it with.

Sarah Jessica Parker

Single, Sexy, Mean

63 Copy quote
You are the guy who'll decide where to go.

Dr. Seuss

Graduation, Encouraging, Being Single

Dr. Seuss (2017). “Oh, The Places You’ll Go”, p.7, HarperCollins UK

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I don't need anyone to rectify my existence. The most profound relationship we will ever have is the one with ourselves.

Shirley MacLaine

Single, Being Alone, Profound

96 Copy quote
When we are unable to find tranquility within ourselves, it is useless to seek it elsewhere.

Francois de La Rochefoucauld

Inspirational, Single, Peace

70 Copy quote