When your mother asks, 'Do you want a piece of advice?' it is a mere formality. It doesn't matter if you answer yes or no. You're going to get it anyway.
God could not be everywhere, and therefore he made mothers.
When my kids become wild and unruly, I use a nice, safe playpen. When they're finished, I climb out.
My mother had a great deal of trouble with me, but I think she enjoyed it.
When you are a mother, you are never really alone in your thoughts. A mother always has to think twice, once for herself and once for her child.
If evolution really works, how come mothers only have two hands?
Setting a good example for your children takes all the fun out of middle age.
My mother tried to kill me when I was a baby. She denied it. She said she thought the plastic bag would keep me fresh.
As a child my family's menu consisted of two choices: take it or leave it.
Of all the rights of women, the greatest is to be a mother
OF COURSE I'd like to be the ideal mother. But I'm too busy raising children.
Mama was my greatest teacher, a teacher of compassion, love and fearlessness. If love is sweet as a flower, then my mother is that sweet flower of love.
Insanity is hereditary; you get it from your children.
I want my children to have all the things I couldn't afford. Then I want to move in with them.
I remember my mother's prayers and they have always followed me. They have clung to me all my life.
The most remarkable thing about my mother is that for thirty years she served the family nothing but leftovers. The original meal has never been found.
I do not like broccoli. And I haven't liked it since I was a little kid and my mother made me eat it. And I'm President of the United States and I'm not going to eat any more broccoli.
I'm a mother with two small children, so I don't take as much crap as I used to.
The most important thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother.
Any mother could perform the jobs of several air-traffic controllers with ease.
A mother's arms are made of tenderness and children sleep soundly in them.
A suburban mother's role is to deliver children obstetrically once, and by car forever after.
My mother loved children - she would have given anything if I had been one.
A mother has to think twice, once for herself and once for her child.
Neurotics build castles in the air, psychotics live in them. My mother cleans them.
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