Science is a wonderful thing if one does not have to earn one's living at it.
The difference between screwing around and science is writing it down.
To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.
Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former.
Science is the great antidote to the poison of enthusiasm and superstition.
If we knew what it was we were doing, it would not be called research, would it?
If you torture the data long enough, it will confess.
In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move.
Science can never solve one problem without raising ten more problems.
Science does not know its debt to imagination.
If you think research is expensive, try disease!
I have had my results for a long time: but I do not yet know how I am to arrive at them.
The great tragedy of science - the slaying of a beautiful hypothesis by an ugly fact.
The most exciting phrase to hear in science, the one that heralds new discoveries, is not 'Eureka!' but 'That's funny...'
In physics, you don't have to go around making trouble for yourself - nature does it for you.
I'm sure the universe is full of intelligent life. It's just been too intelligent to come here.
What is a scientist after all? It is a curious man looking through a keyhole, the keyhole of nature, trying to know what's going on.
Scientists now believe that the primary biological function of breasts is to make males stupid.
Computers are useless. They can only give you answers.
Don't worry about people stealing your ideas. If your ideas are any good, you'll have to ram them down people's throats.
Once you can accept the universe as matter expanding into nothing that is something, wearing stripes with plaid comes easy.
Molecular biology is essentially the practice of biochemistry without a license.
There is a theory which states that if ever anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable.There is another theory which states that this has already happened.
Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning.
The farther the experiment is from theory, the closer it is to the Nobel Prize.
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