Monkeys Quotes - Page 6

• I don't mind if, according to the Law of Evolution, my grand grand grand etc. father is a monkey,but I do mind if he is a hyena or a jackal!

  Mehmet Murat Ildan

  Father, Law, Mind

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• I bet it breaks your heart to have two of your friends pine for me the way they do," he said proudly. "Luna...and now Scarlet. They can't keep their hands off of me." "It's just because you are foreign to them. It's like if they went to the zoo and stared at the monkeys. You are the monkey.

  Ellen Schreiber

  Zoos, Heart, Hands

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• Scientists believe that monkeys can be taught to think, lie and even play politics within their community. If we can just teach them to cheat on their wives we can save millions on congressional salaries.

  Jay Leno

  Lying, Believe, Thinking

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• Let's face it, the average computer user has the brain of a Spider Monkey.

  Bill Gates

  Average, Brain, Spiders

  "The Bill Gates Interview". Interview with Andrew Lephter, Pointless Waste of Time Website, slated.org. February 21, 2000.

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• I'll need you to get a leash for my monkey, Claude, and also a hat." "Of course, monsieur" "Do you think he needs a little coat as well?" "Perhaps not in this weather, monsieur." "You are right," Magnus said with a sight. "Make it a simple dressing gown, just like mine." "Which one, monsieur?" "The one in rose and silver." "Excellent choice, monsieur.

  Cassandra Clare

  Simple, Thinking, Sight

  "The Bane Chronicles". Book by Cassandra Clare, Sarah Rees Brennan and Maureen Johnson, November 11, 2014.

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• We made it nearly 20 centuries, a bunch of monkeys with PH Ds.

  Jimmy Buffett

  Work, Century, Made

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• It wasn't a monkey on my back, it was Planet of the Apes.

  Mick McCarthy

  Soccer, Football, Apes

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• If you look at the monkeys, you can learn many things about the men; if you look at the men, you can learn many things about the madness!

  Mehmet Murat Ildan

  Men, Looks, Madness

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• Probably the difference between man and the monkeys is that the monkeys are merely bored, while man has boredom plus imagination.

  Lin Yutang

  Blessing, Men, Differences

  Lin Yutang (1937). “The Importance of Living”

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• I haven't seen a half-monkey, half person yet.

  Glenn Beck

  Half, Persons, Havens

  "Glenn Beck Says: No Proof of Evolution". www.theatlantic.com.

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• A monkey is a much better voter than a socialist. Statistically speaking, if we assume that there are two options to choose from: the "A" and the "B" - the monkey is voting randomly, so its wrong 50% of the time. The socialist, however - is always wrong.

  Janusz Korwin-Mikke

  Two, Voting, Voters

  Blog, November 7, 2008.

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• Some in management positions operate as if they are in a tree of monkeys. They make sure that everyone at the top of the tree looking down sees only smiles. But all too often, those at the bottom looking up see only asses.

  Simon Sinek

  Tree, Management, Ass

  Simon Sinek (2009). “Start with Why: How Great Leaders Inspire Everyone to Take Action”, p.82, Penguin

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• Do anything in this world but monkey with somebody eles's religion. What reasoning of conceit makes anyone think theirs is right?

  Will Rogers

  Thinking, Religion, World

  Will Rogers, Bryan B. Sterling (1995). “Will Rogers Speaks: Over 1,000 Timeless Quotations for Public Speakers (writers, Politicians, Comedians, Browsers ...)”, M Evans & Company

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• Your own space, man, it's so important. That's why we were doomed because we didn't have any. It is like monkeys in a zoo. They die. You know, everything needs to be left alone.

  George Harrison

  Zoos, Men, Space

  "I, Me, Mine". Book by George Harrison, 1979.

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• Stop the nurse like the monkey.

  Jeff Lindsay

  Nurse

  Jeff Lindsay (2005). “Darkly Dreaming Dexter”, p.128, Vintage Crime/Black Lizard

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• Many people, meeting Aziraphale for the first time, formed three impressions: that he was English, that he was intelligent, and that he was gayer than a treeful of monkeys on nitrous oxide.

  Terry Pratchett

  Intelligent, People, Three

  "Good Omens: The Nice and Accurate Prophecies of Agnes Nutter, Witch (Friday)". Book by Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman, May 1, 1990.

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• Claim whatever you want. Say you only want a happy family or a successful career or a big house. I say: no, that's not what you want. You'll settle for those things, but you really want a monkey that does your evil bidding. Pullman is a genius just for this.

  Maureen Johnson

  Successful, Careers, Evil

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• Are cats strange animals or do they so resemble us that we find them curious as we do monkeys?

  John Steinbeck

  Cat, Animal, Strange

  John Steinbeck (2008). “The Winter of Our Discontent”, p.72, Penguin

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• Barry, you're over thirty years old. You owe it to your mum and dad not to sing in a group called Sonic Death Monkey.

  Nick Hornby

  Dad, Years, Groups

  Nick Hornby (1996). “High Fidelity”, p.314, Penguin

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• My Master of Arts degree means nothing at all to these monkeys and I have come to share their indifference.

  Charles Portis

  Art, Mean, Degrees

  Charles Portis (2013). “Escape Velocity”, p.161, The Overlook Press

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• If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes?

  Steven Wright

  Funny, Humor, Men

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• There are one hundred and ninety-three living species of monkeys and apes. One hundred and ninety-two of them are covered with hair. The exception is a naked ape self-named Homo sapiens. The zoologist now has to start making comparisons. Where else is nudity at a premium.

  Desmond Morris

  Hair, Self, Two

  The Naked Ape introduction (1967)

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• If you sleep, Desire grows in you Like a vine in the forest. Like a monkey in the forest You jump from tree to tree, Never finding the fruit - From life to life, Never finding peace. If you are filled with desire Your sorrows swell Like the grass after the rain. But if you subdue desire Your sorrows shall fall from you Like drops of water from a lotus flower.

  Gautama Buddha

  Rain, Flower, Fall

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• To put it crudely but graphically, the monkey who did not have a realistic perception of the tree branch he jumped for was soon a dead monkey-and therefore did not become one of our ancestors.

  George Gaylord Simpson

  Death, Science, Tree

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• My most heartfelt thank you goes to Impact Future Media and Cartoon Monkey Studio. Their dedication to the truth is very uncommon in the world we live in today. I am now, and will always be, grateful to their organizations.

  John McAfee

  Thank You, Grateful, Dedication

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