Smart Quotes - Page 38

• The smart way to improve broadband is not to junk the existing network but to make the most of it. It’s to let a competitive market deliver the speeds that people need at an affordable price with government improving infrastructure in the areas where market competition won’t deliver it.

  Tony Abbott

  Government, People, Competition

  Full text of Tony Abbott's budget reply speech, May 12, 2011.

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• I feel that Im not losing the game for our team. Im trying to give us the best opportunity to win the football game. I did everything I could to lose the Jets game but we won. And the Patriots game, I didnt play well. I think that this year, I just come out and play smart football. I got some good advice the other day (from CBS Sports Dan Dierdorf): Every drive that ends in a kick is a good drive.

  Ben Roethlisberger

  Sports, Football, Team

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• People say you need to be strong, smart, and lucky to survive hard times, war, a natural disaster, or physical torture. But I say emotional abuse—anxiety, fear, guilt, and degradation—is far worse and much harder to survive.

  Lisa See

  Strong, War, Hard Times

  Lisa See (2010). “Shanghai Girls”, p.35, A&C Black

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• Fortunately, because of the spread of smart devices, people take games for granted now. It's a good thing for us, because we do not have to worry about making games something that are relevant to general people's daily lives.

  Shigeru Miyamoto

  Games, People, Worry

  "Nintendo's Miyamoto Doesn't Want to Make Games for People Who Have Only A 'Passive' Interest In Gaming" by Eddie Makuch, www.gamespot.com. August 27, 2014.

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• I think I'm smart, and I know I was a good mom. But there wasn't a lot I could point to and say, that's why I'm special.

  Charles Duhigg

  Mom, Thinking, Special

  Charles Duhigg (2012). “The Power of Habit: Why We Do What We Do, and How to Change”, p.246, Random House

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• Out-of-control emotions can make smart people stupid.

  Byron Nelson

  Stupid, Golf, People

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• I might be in the basement. I'll go upstairs and check. We adore chaos because we love to produce order. I don't use drugs; my dreams are frightening enough.

  M. C. Escher

  Funny, Dream, Clever

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• May we now all rise and sing the eternal school hymn: "Attack. Attack. Attack Attack Attack!"

  Danny Baker

  Funny, Clever, School

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• There was an advert I rather liked. Devastated woman: "I've just seen the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse!" Husband: "Never mind, love, it's not the end of the world."

  Simon Barnes

  Funny, Clever, Husband

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• "More fun than a barrel of monkeys." Has anyone ever stopped to think how cranky, if not downright vicious, a barrelful of monkeys would be, especially once released from the barrel?

  Tom Shales

  Funny, Clever, Thinking

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• There are some situations from which one can only escape by acting like a devil or a lunatic.

  George Orwell

  Funny, Clever, Devil

  George Orwell, Keith Gessen (2009). “All Art Is Propaganda: Critical Essays”, p.344, Houghton Mifflin Harcourt

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• Everyone should have an evil secret plan.

  Denis Leary

  Funny, Clever, Should Have

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• I was never over-weight, just under-tall. The correct height for my weight at the moment is seven feet ten and a half inches.

  Brendan Grace

  Funny, Clever, Feet

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• When I was a kid we were so poor, if I hadn't been a boy I wouldn't have had anything to play with.

  Rodney Dangerfield

  Funny, Clever, Kids

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• No guy in the history of America has ordered a Smirnoff Ice at a bar without hating himself a little.

  Jay Black

  Funny, Clever, Hate

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• They all laughed when I said I wanted to be a comedian. Well, they're not laughing now.

  Bob Monkhouse

  Funny, Clever, Humor

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• Whenever I hear the word "share" I would reach for a gun if I had one. "Share" is frequently followed by the word "feelings", and I have enough of my own thank you; please do us both a favor and repress yours.

  Stewart Brand

  Funny, Clever, Gun

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• I am all in favour of spontaneity, providing it is carefully planned and ruthlessly controlled.

  John Gielgud

  Funny, Clever, Favour

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• If I had a Boy Scout I could make a fire by rubbing his hind legs together.

  Robert A. Heinlein

  Funny, Clever, Boys

  Robert A. Heinlein (1982). “Friday”

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• I'm a Leo. Leos don't believe in this astrology stuff.

  Tom Neff

  Funny, Clever, Believe

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• Everybody is a potential murderer. I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.

  Clarence Darrow

  Funny, Clever, Reading

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• Guy goes into a bar with a duck under his arm. Bartender says, "Where'd you get the pig?" Guy says, "This is a duck." Bartender says, "I was talking to the duck."

  Rodney Dangerfield

  Funny, Clever, Pigs

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• I wish I could think of a positive point to leave you with. Will you take two negative points?

  Woody Allen

  Funny, Clever, Thinking

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• Worst Month of the Year: February. February has only 28 days in it, which means that if you rent an apartment, you are paying for three full days you don't get. Try to avoid Februarys whenever possible.

  Steven Rubenstein

  Funny, Clever, Mean

  "A very good year, sort of - 1982" by Steve Rubenstein, www.sfgate.com. November 17, 2013.

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• Offering Dragons quarter is no good, they regrow all their parts and come on again. They have to be killed.

  John Berryman

  Funny, Clever, Offering

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