Ten Quotes - Page 5

• Advil has a candy coating. It's delicious. Then it says on the bottle, do not have more than two. Then why do they have a candy coating? I cannot help myself. Let me have ten Advil, I have a sweet tooth.

  Mitch Hedberg

  Funny, Sweet, Humor

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• A doctor says to a man, "You want to improve your love life? You need to get some exercise. Run ten miles a day." Two weeks later, the man called the doctor. The doctor says, "How is your love life since you have been running?" "I don't know, I'm 140 miles away!"

  Henny Youngman

  Funny, Running, Love Life

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• I'm not saying find someone and ask them if you can mow their grass for ten dollars. I'm saying find weeds that need pulling and pull them.

  Andy Andrews

  Weed, Dollars, Needs

  "Andy Andrews Interview: Modern Day Will Rogers Details His Latest Novel, 'The Noticer'". Interview with Melissa Parker, smashinginterviews.com. June 11, 2009.

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• I've been writing songs and making music since I was probably ten years old...so my inspirations back then, I don't know - I guess it was something that was innate. I was really shaped to make hip-hop music and love hip hop.

  Hoodie Allen

  Song, Inspiration, Writing

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• Do they allow tipping on the boat? - Yes, sir. Have you got two fives? - Oh, yes, sir. Then you won't need the ten cents I was going to give you.

  Groucho Marx

  Funny, Humor, Two

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• Yes, about ten minutes.

  Duke of Wellington

  Funny, Humor, Minutes

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• That's stupid. If anyone sees themselves in ten years they're lying to themselves first.

  Lil Wayne

  Lying, Stupid, Years

  "Lil Wayne: The Uncut Q&A". Interview with Devin Friedman, www.gq.com. January 13, 2009.

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• I think having a good agent is key. I've been with mine for ten years now, and she's very honest with me. There are a lot of times I've sent her books that were not so good because I was tired of writing, or panicked about money, and she's told me flat out, "You don't want this to be your next book. Trust me."

  Sarah Dessen

  Book, Writing, Tired

  Source: cynthialeitichsmith.blogspot.com

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• I always loved animals. And when I was ten, I decided I had to go to Africa and live with animals and write books about them.

  Jane Goodall

  Book, Writing, Animal

  "Dr Jane Goodall, primatologist". Interview with Lauren Barker, theweekendedition.com.au. June 5, 2014.

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• Pastoring the flock with words. I love that. We always have a prayer time in the middle of our service. We take about eight or ten minutes before I preach, after we've sung, and invite people to come forward for prayer. That's a tender moment to me. I don't preach much in that, but I like to speak to the people.

  Max Lucado

  Prayer, Eight, People

  Source: www.biblestudytools.com

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• I'm tired of the 'can't win against evil' way. I'm sorry, you cannot. They'll run you over. So that is my one big passion. 'Ten Stupid Things People Do to Let Evil Win' - that will be my next passion book. I am angry.

  Laura Schlessinger

  Running, Sorry, Stupid

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• The important thing is the 80/20 rule: 80% of the effects come from 20% of the causes. This means that if you're doing ten tasks, two are going to be vastly more important than others.

  Brian Tracy

  Mean, Two, Important

  Source: www.webpagefx.com

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• I'm an idiot, basically. I don't think that I'm a dumb guy, but I also realise that I have access to about 0.1 percent of the information that I need to have a truly informed opinion about half the stuff I talk about. I'm like that loud guy in the bar, who kind of makes sense for about ten minutes, and then you realise he flunked everything at high school so you just laugh at him.

  Bill Burr

  School, Thinking, Laughing

  Source: www.timeout.com

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• Aldous Huxley took the drug mescaline and then chronicled his experience in the book The Doors of Perception. Now, I don't actually think that's the first thing he wrote: he probably wrote 'my brain is melting' ten thousand times, but it was the book that the critics latched on to.

  Bill Bailey

  Funny, Book, Humor

  "Is It Bill Bailey?". Comedy, Music, 1998.

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• And then there was my mate who'd just been fitted with a brand new hearing aid. "It's the best in the world", he said. "What type is it?", I asked and he said "ten past twelve".

  Billy Connolly

  Funny, Humor, Past

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• And if ten percent of men are gay and twenty percent of men are Chinese, what are the odds that a men chosen at random spends his free time and mealtime while on his knees.

  Bo Burnham

  Funny, Humor, Gay

  Song: New Math, Album: Bo Burnham

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• Community college is like a disco with books: "Here's ten dollars; let me get my learn on!"

  Chris Rock

  Funny, Book, Humor

  "Chris Rock: Bring the Pain". TV Special, June 1, 1996.

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• Ten years after the Chernobyl accident, and am I the only one that's disappointed? Still no superheros.

  Jimmy Carr

  Funny, Humor, Years

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• This is Frank Carson, News at Ten, Sober.

  Frank Carson

  Funny, Humor, News

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• This city has so many beautiful women. I fall in love like every ten minutes, I'm sitting on the subway, I'm like, "There's my wife... there she is - oh, she's getting off. All right, there's the woman - all right, that's a man."

  Jim Gaffigan

  Funny, Beautiful, Falling In Love

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• I backed horse last week at ten to one. It came in at quarter past four.

  Tommy Cooper

  Funny, Horse, Humor

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• ... We probably funded a rate of something like one out of ten solo teams.

  Sam Altman

  Team, Solo, Rate

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• If you compromise in the first five, ten hires it might kill the company.

  Sam Altman

  Team, Might, Firsts

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• Nobody really wants to work anymore. Nobody has the dedication to say, "It's going to take me ten years to get through this thing."

  Dolores Ashcroft-Nowicki

  Dedication, Years, Want

  Interview with Mark Stavish, www.servantsofthelight.org. June 10, 1996.

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• The fact that I have a little ten-megapixel camera with me all the time, is way better than having the greatest camera in the world sitting at home on a desk instead of on my shoulder.

  David Burnett

  Home, Cameras, Sitting

  Source: theonlinephotographer.typepad.com

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