A man's ideal woman is the one he couldn't get.
When you see what some women marry, you realize how they must hate to work for a living.
A bachelor gets tangled up with a lot of women in order to avoid getting tied up to one.
Marriage is the only thing that affords a woman the pleasure of company and the perfect sensation of solitude at the same time.
To a man, marriage means giving up four out of five of the chiffonier drawers; to a woman, giving up four out of five of her opinions.
Jealousy is the tie that binds, and binds, and binds.
Love, like a chicken salad or restaurant hash, must be taken with blind faith or it loses its flavor.
It's easier to hide your light under a bushel than to keep your shady side dark.
Before marriage, when a woman speaks to a man in an undertone, he calls it "cooing"; after marriage, he calls it nagging.
A fool and her money are soon courted.
Going through life without love is like going through a good dinner without an appetite -- everything seems so flat and tasteless.
Falling in love consists merely in uncorking the imagination and bottling the common sense.
A man snatches the first kiss, pleads for the second, demands the third, takes the fourth, accepts the fifth - and endures all the rest.
Flirting is the gentle art of making a man feel pleased with himself.
Between lovers a little confession is a dangerous thing.
It is as hard to get a man to stay at home after you've married him as it was to get him to go home before you married him.
Love, the quest; marriage, the conquest; divorce, the inquest.
Ever since Eve started it all by offering Adam the apple, woman's punishment has been to supply a man with food then suffer the consequences when it disagrees with him.
The tenderest spot in a man's make-up is sometimes the bald spot on top of his head.
A husband is what is left of a lover, after the nerve has been extracted.
Before marriage, a man will lie awake thinking about something you said; after marriage , he'll fall asleep before you finish saying it.
Better a lively old epigram than a deadly new one.
A man is like a cat; chase him and he will run - sit still and ignore him and he'll come purring at your feet.
A bride at her second marriage does not wear a veil. She wants to see what she is getting.
Variety is the spice of love.
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