I think the Republican party should be placed in drydock and have the barnacles scraped off its bottom.
If I had to live my life again, I'd make the same mistakes, only sooner.
Too many of our countrymen rejoice in stupidity, look upon ignorance as a badge of honor. They condemn everything they don't understand.
Only good girls keep diaries. Bad girls don't have time.
... all my life I've been terrible at remembering people's names. I once introduced a friend of mine as Martini. Her name was actually Olive.
My father warned me about men and booze but he never said anything about women and cocaine.
Nobody can be exactly like me. Sometimes even I have trouble doing it.
I'll come and make love to you at five o'clock. If I'm late start without me.
Say anything about me, darling, as long as it isn't boring.
Cocaine isn't habit forming. I should know, I've been using it for years
I'd rather be strongly wrong than weakly right.
I have three phobias which, could I mute them, would make my life as slick as a sonnet, but as dull as ditch water: I hate to go to bed, I hate to get up, and I hate to be alone.
I thought I told you to wait in the car.
I've tried several varieties of sex. The conventional position makes me claustrophobic, and the others either give me a stiff neck or lockjaw.
They used to photograph Shirley Temple through gauze. They should photograph me through linoleum.
[To the man who came up to her at a party and exclaimed effusively, 'Tallulah! I haven't seen you for 41 years!':] I thought I told you to wait in the car.
For acting, darlings, is the world's most perilous trade. Compared with actors, steeple jacks and deep-sea divers lead snug and placid lives.
[On being asked in her later years if she were Tallulah:] I'm what's left of her, dahling.
They aren't making mirrors like they use to.
If you really want to help the American theater, don't be an actress, dahling. Be an audience.
I read Shakespeare and the Bible, and I can shoot dice. That's what I call a liberal education.
If I were well behaved, I'd die of boredom.
The less I behave like Whistler's mother the night before, the more I look like her the morning after.
Fill what is empty, empty what is full, and scratch where it itches.
No man worth his salt, no man of spirit and spine, no man for whom I could have any respect, could rejoice in the identification of Tallulah's husband. It's tough enough to be bogged down in a legend. It would be even tougher to marry one.
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