Everything takes longer than you expect, even when you expect it to take longer than you expect.
I feel much better, now that I've given up hope.
The majority is never right, unless it includes me.
Just when I nearly had the answer, I forgot the question.
Please don't believe everything you hear about me, regardless of how true it may be.
Maybe I'm lucky to be going so slowly, because I may be going in the wrong direction
I didn't say it was your fault. I said I was going to blame it on you.
What happened to you could have been worse - it could have happened to me.
Not being able to do everything is no excuse for not doing everything you can.
I've found the secret of happiness, total disregard of everybody.
My cat knows the meaning of life, but has no interest in sharing the secret.
At great expense, we have built a vast system of inter-connecting stupidities.
By using your intelligence, you can sometimes make your problems twice as complicated.
There is one pain, I often feel, which you will never know. It's caused by the absence of you.
Speak nothing but the truth, and you'll soon be considered dangerous.
Due to circumstances beyond my control, I am master of my fate and captain of my soul.
What we really need is to realize how little we really need.
My opinions may have changed, but not the fact that I'm right.
Why aren't you more grateful when I prove how wrong you've been?
My life so far has been a long series of things I wasn't ready for.
If only our great thinkers could learn to talk, and our great talkers could learn to think.
Life is the only game in which the object of the game is to learn the rules.
If you can neither accept it or change it, try to laugh at it.
There's nothing on my mind that couldn't be expressed by a long insane outburst of hysterical rage.
I will always love the false image I had of you.
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