Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm schizophrenic, and so am I.
What the world needs is more geniuses with humility; there are so few of us left.
The only difference between the Democrats and the Republicans is that the Democrats allow the poor to be corrupt, too.
Schizophrenia beats dining alone.
It'd be nice to please everyone but I thought it would be more interesting to have a point of view.
A politician is a man who will double cross that bridge when he comes to it.
Happiness isn't something you experience; it's something you remember.
When I was young I looked like Al Capone, but I lacked his compassion.
It's not what you are, it's what you don't become that hurts.
I was once thrown out of a mental hospital for depressing the other patients.
My psychiatrist once said to me, 'Maybe life isn't for everyone'.
There are two sides to every question: my side and the wrong side.
I envy people who drink. At least they have something to blame everything on.
There's a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line.
Strip away the phony tinsel of Hollywood and you'll find the real tinsel underneath.
In some situations I was difficult, in odd moments impossible, in rare moments loathsome, but at my best unapproachably great.
Debbie Reynolds is as wistful as an iron foundry.
George, if you had to do it all over, would you fall in love with yourself again?
A conductor should reconcile himself to the realization that regardless of his approach or temperament the eventual result is the same-the orchestra will hate him.
You can't possibly hear the last movement of Beethoven's Seventh and go slow. (Oscar trying to talk his way out of a speeding ticket)
I don't like to play the piano. It makes me too attractive.
Now that Marilyn Monroe is kosher, Arthur Miller can eat her.
Every time I look at you I get a fierce desire to be lonesome.
Underneath this flabby exterior is an enormous lack of character.
I'm a study of a man in chaos in search of frenzy.
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