If you were to open up a baby's head - and I am not for a moment suggesting that you should - you would find nothing but an enormous drool gland.
Babies are such a nice way to start people.
Babies are always more trouble than you thought and more wonderful.
Having a baby is one of the most wonderful things in your life, as well as the hardest thing in your life.
An ugly baby is a very nasty object - and the prettiest is frightful.
Congratulations are in order for Woody Allen - he and Soon Yi have a brand new baby daughter. It's all part of Woody's plan to grow his own wives.
You gotta love livin', baby, 'cause dyin' is a pain in the ass.
Having a baby dragged me, kicking and screaming, from the world of self-absorption.
A baby is an inestimable blessing and bother.
If nature had arranged that husbands and wives should have children alternatively, there would never be more than three in a family.
Every baby born into the world is a finer one than the last.
A baby is born with a need to be loved - and never outgrows it.
A new baby is like the beginning of all things - wonder, hope, a dream of possibilities.
There was never a child so lovely but his mother was glad to get him to sleep.
Having a child is surely the most beautifully irrational act that two people in love can commit.
The only time a woman really succeeds in changing a man is when he is a baby.
There is nothing like a newborn baby to renew your spirit - and to buttress your resolve to make the world a better place.
Carrying a baby is the most rewarding experience a woman can enjoy.
A 66-YEAR-OLD woman has become the oldest new mum in Britain after giving birth to a baby boy. I'm amazed she needed to have a caesarean section though, you'd think at 66 she would have needed some masking tape down there just to stop it falling out.
No one likes change... but babies in diapers.
I have the most lovely, healthy bouncing baby, she was all very compact and the right size.
One of the most obvious results of having a baby around the house is to turn two good people into complete idiots who probably wouldn't have been much worse than mere imbeciles without it.
The kind of man who thinks that helping with the dishes is beneath him will also think that helping with the baby is beneath him, and then he certainly is not going to be a very successful father.
In the sheltered simplicity of the first days after a baby is born, one sees again the magical closed circle, the miraculous sense of two people existing only for each other.
A baby's a full time job for three adults. Nobody tells you that when you're pregnant, or you'd probably jump off a bridge. Nobody tells you how all-consuming it is to be a mother-how reading goes out the window and thinking too.
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