History teaches us that men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all other alternatives.
Suppose you were an idiot, and suppose you were a member of Congress; but I repeat myself.
I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.
Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.
I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
Sometimes I need what only you can provide: your absence.
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
If you're too open-minded; your brains will fall out.
I have never killed any one, but I have read some obituary notices with great satisfaction.
Don't be humble... you're not that great.
If you ever become a mother, can I have one of the puppies?
I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.
If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.
A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.
Every time I look at you I get a fierce desire to be lonesome.
For every dark night, there is a brighter day.
I have had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn't it.
He has no enemies, but he is intensely disliked by his friends.
The trouble with her is that she lacks the power of conversation but not the power of speech.
He was happily married - but his wife wasn't.
I won't say ours was a tough school, but we had our own coroner. We used to write songs like, "What I'm going to do if I grow up".
A sarcastic person has a superiority complex that can be cured only by the honesty of humility.
I never forget a face, but in your case I'll make an exception.
How can you have any pudding if you don't eat your meat?
I didn't like the play, but then I saw it under adverse conditions - the curtain was up.
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