Funny Family Quotes

• In every conceivable manner, the family is link to our past, bridge to our future.

  Alex Haley

  Inspirational, Family, Meaningful

  "Traits of a Healthy Family" by Dolores Curran, (p. 199), 1985.

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• To lose one parent may be regarded as a misfortune; to lose both looks like carelessness.

  Oscar Wilde

  Funny, Family, Sarcastic

  The Importance of Being Earnest act 1 (1895)

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• If you ever start feeling like you have the goofiest, craziest, most dysfunctional family in the world, all you have to do is go to a state fair. Because five minutes at the fair, you'll be going, 'you know, we're alright. We are dang near royalty.'

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Funny, Family, Feelings

  Interview with Paul Harris, www.harrisonline.com. May 30, 1996.

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• Some family trees bear an enormous crop of nuts.

  Wayne Huizenga

  Family, Nuts, Tree

  10 Copy quote

• Other things may change us, but we start and end with the family.

  Anthony Brandt

  Change, Family, Grandparent

  44 Copy quote

• To put the world in order, we must first put the nation in order; to put the nation in order, we must first put the family in order; to put the family in order; we must first cultivate our personal life; we must first set our hearts right.

  Confucius

  Inspirational, Life, Change

  42 Copy quote

• Never underestimate a child's ability to get into more trouble.

  Martin Mull

  Funny, Children, Kids

  6 Copy quote

• Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.

  George Burns

  Love, Inspirational, Funny

  Biography/Personal Quotes, www.imdb.com.

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• Family faces are magic mirrors. Looking at people who belong to us, we see the past, present and future.

  Gail Buckley

  Family, Past, Mirrors

  "Books of the Times" by Christopher Lehmann-Haupt, www.nytimes.com. 1986.

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• Insanity runs in my family. It practically gallops.

  Cary Grant

  Family, Running, Insanity

  "Fictional character: Mortimer Brewster". "Arsenic and Old Lace", www.imdb.com. 1944.

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  The only rock I know that stays steady, the only institution I know that works, is the family.

  Lee Iacocca

  Family, Cousin, Rocks

  63 Copy quote
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  I grew up with six brothers. That's how I learned to dance - waiting for the bathroom.

  Bob Hope

  Inspirational, Funny, Life

  60 Copy quote

• The family is one of nature's masterpieces.

  George Santayana

  Inspirational, Family, Brother

  George Santayana, Marianne S. Wokeck, Martin A. Coleman, James Gouinlock (2013). “The Life of Reason or The Phases of Human Progress: Reason in Society, Volume VII, Book Two”, p.23, MIT Press

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• Human beings are the only creatures on earth that allow their children to come back home.

  Bill Cosby

  Funny, Motivational, Family

  Twitter post from Jan 09, 2010

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• Parents are not interested in justice, they're interested in peace and quiet.

  Bill Cosby

  Family, Parenting, Justice

  Twitter post from Nov 03, 2009

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• Like all the best families, we have our share of eccentricities, of impetuous and wayward youngsters and of family disagreements.

  Queen Elizabeth II

  Funny, Family, Queens

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• The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree: the presence of a happy family all wrapped up in each other.

  Bill Vaughan

  Inspirational, Family, Happy

  33 Copy quote

• I live by my own rules (reviewed, revised, and approved by my wife).. but still my own.

  Si Robertson

  Funny, Life, Marriage

  Si Robertson (2014). “Si-cology 1: Tales and Wisdom from Duck Dynasty’s Favorite Uncle”, p.192, Simon and Schuster

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• If the family were a fruit, it would be an orange, a circle of sections, held together but separable - each segment distinct.

  Letty Cottin Pogrebin

  Family, Children, Home

  Letty Cottin Pogrebin (1983). “Family politics: love and power on an intimate frontier”, McGraw-Hill Companies

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• You don't choose your family. They are God's gift to you, as you are to them.

  Desmond Tutu

  Inspirational, Family, God

  Address at his enthronement as Anglican archbishop of Cape Town, September 7, 1986.

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• To us, family means putting your arms around each other and being there.

  Barbara Bush

  Inspirational, Family, Mean

  67 Copy quote

• There is no such thing as fun for the whole family.

  Jerry Seinfeld

  Funny, Family, Children

  18 Copy quote

• Like religion, politics, and family planning, cereal is not a topic to be brought up in public. It's too controversial.

  Erma Bombeck

  Family, Food, Cereal

  12 Copy quote

• I think the family is the place where the most ridiculous and least respectable things in the world go on.

  Ugo Betti

  Family, Home, Thinking

  Ugo Betti (1968). “Three Plays”

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• As a child my family's menu consisted of two choices: take it or leave it.

  Buddy Hackett

  Funny, Family, Mothers Day

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