Funny Graduation Quotes

• If you can imagine it, you can achieve it. If you can dream it, you can become it.

  William Arthur Ward

  Inspirational, Motivational, Positive

  "Melania Trump Quote Sounds Suspiciously Similar To Marla Maples" by Alana Horowitz Satlin, www.huffingtonpost.com. November 04, 2016.

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• A professor is someone who talks in someone else's sleep.

  W. H. Auden

  Inspirational, Graduation, Education

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• I have never been jealous. Not even when my dad finished fifth grade a year before I did.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Funny, Graduation, Jealousy

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• A graduation ceremony is an event where the commencement speaker tells thousands of students dressed in identical caps and gowns that 'individuality' is the key to success.

  Robert Orben

  Funny, Graduation, Senior

  "A Few Tips for the Graduates". The Topeka Capital-Journal, abcnews.go.com. May 20, 2007.

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• You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself in any direction you choose. You're on your own, and you know what you know. And you are the guy who'll decide where to go.

  Dr. Seuss

  Life, Graduation, Confidence

  Theodor Seuss Geisel, “Oh, The Places You'll Go”

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• Try putting your iPhones down every once in a while and look at people's faces.

  Amy Poehler

  Iphone, People, Trying

  Harvard University Class Day Commencement Address, delivered 26 May 2011

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• Education is the most powerful weapon which you can use to change the world.

  Nelson Mandela

  Inspirational, Change, Inspiring

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• All your dreams can come true if you have the courage to pursue them.

  Walt Disney

  Inspirational, Life, Motivational

  "How to Be Like Walt : Capturing the Magic Every Day of Your Life". Book by Pat Williams, 2004.

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• It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are.

  e. e. cummings

  Inspirational, Motivational, Birthday

  "Biography/Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

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• So, what's it like in the real world? Well, the food is better, but beyond that, I don't recommend it.

  Bill Watterson

  Graduation, Real, World

  "Some thoughts on the real world by one who glimpsed it and fled". Bill Watterson's commencement speech at the Kenyon College in Gambier, Ohio, www.graduationwisdom.com. May 20, 1990.

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• Nothing worth knowing can be taught.

  Oscar Wilde

  Graduation, Knowing, Taught

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  Always be a first-rate version of yourself, instead of a second-rate version of somebody else.

  Judy Garland

  Inspirational, Life, Motivational

  "Business Etiquette for the Nineties: Your Ticket to Career Success". Book by Lou Kennedy, 1992.

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• The fireworks begin today. Each diploma is a lighted match. Each one of you is a fuse.

  Ed Koch

  Success, Graduation, Education

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• A classical education enables you to despise the wealth that it prevents you from achieving.

  Russell Green

  Graduation, Work, Wealth

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• I think sleeping was my problem in school. If school had started at 4:00 in the afternoon, I'd be a college graduate today.

  George Foreman

  Graduation, School, Sleep

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• Break rules. Leave the world more interesting for your being here.

  Neil Gaiman

  Graduation, Interesting, World

  Neil Gaiman (2016). “The View from the Cheap Seats: Selected Nonfiction”, p.418, Hachette UK

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• Make glorious and fantastic mistakes.

  Neil Gaiman

  Graduation, Mistake, Graduates

  Neil Gaiman's Commencement Address at The University of the Arts in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, www.uarts.edu. May 17, 2012.

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• You're going to fall down, but the world doesn't care how many times you fall down, as long as it's one fewer than the numbers of times you get back up.

  Aaron Sorkin

  Graduation, Fall, Numbers

  "Remarks by Aaron Sorkin ’83 at Syracuse University’s 158th Commencement and the SUNY College of Environmental Science and Forestry’s 115th Commencement". Aaron Sorkin's Commencement address at Syracuse University in New York, news.syr.edu. May 13, 2012.

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• There's few things that get you over your own crap more than working hard.

  Adam Savage

  Inspirational, Graduation, Over You

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• You can't cross a chasm in two small jumps.

  David Lloyd George

  Graduation, Commitment, Two

  "Design for Power : The Struggle for the World". Book by Frederick Lewis Schuman, 1941.

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• The things taught in schools & colleges are not an education but the means of education.

  Ralph Waldo Emerson

  Graduation, Education, Teaching

  "Selected Writings of Ralph Waldo Emerson".

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• Do not follow where the path may lead.

  Ralph Waldo Emerson

  Graduation, Travel, Adventure

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• The man who graduates today and stops learning tomorrow is uneducated the day after.

  Newton D. Baker

  Inspiring, Graduation, Congratulations

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• I’ve found that nothing in life is worthwhile unless you take risks.

  Denzel Washington

  Inspirational, Graduation, Education

  Denzel Washington's Commencement Address at the University of Pennsylvania in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, almanac.upenn.edu. May 16, 2011.

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• If you aren't fired with enthusiasm, you will be fired with enthusiasm.

  Vince Lombardi

  Motivational, Positive, Graduation

  Vince Lombardi (2012). “What it Takes to be Number One”, p.92, Thomas Nelson Inc

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