Never doubt the courage of the French. They were the ones who discovered that snails are edible.
Wisdom is the reward you get for a lifetime of listening when you'd have preferred to talk.
Some of the world's greatest feats were accomplished by people not smart enough to know they were impossible.
If people concentrated on the really important things in life, there'd be a shortage of fishing poles.
A true friend is one who overlooks your failures
and tolerates your success.
Life expectancy would grow by leaps and bounds if green vegetables smelled as good as bacon.
More marriages might survive if the partners realized that sometimes the better comes after the worse.
Nostalgia: A device that removes the ruts and potholes from memory lane.
Wisdom is the quality that keeps you from getting into situations where you need it.
If the English language made any sense, lackadaisical would have something to do with a shortage of flowers.
Few things are more delightful than grandchildren fighting over your lap.
What some people mistake for the high cost of living is really the cost of living high.
Spring is when you feel like whistling even with a shoe full of slush.
To err is human; to admit it, superhuman.
Establishing goals is all right if you don't let them deprive you of interesting detours.
For disappearing acts, it's hard to beat what happens to the eight hours supposedly left after eight of sleep and eight of work.
The aging process has you firmly in its grasp if you never get the urge to throw a snowball.
A pun is the lowest form of humor, unless you thought of it yourself.
Home computers are being called upon to perform many new functions, including the consumption of homework formerly eaten by the dog.
A weed is a plant that has mastered every survival skill except for learning how to grow in rows.
The surprising thing about young fools is how many survive to become old fools.
A lot of people mistake a short memory for a clear conscience.
Fancy Restaurant: one that serves cold soup on purpose.
Bad news travels fast. Good news takes the scenic route.
A clean basement, garage and attic are signs of an empty life.
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