A politician is a man who will double cross that bridge when he comes to it.
What the world needs is more geniuses with humility; there are so few of us left.
Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm schizophrenic, and so am I.
My psychiatrist once said to me, 'Maybe life isn't for everyone'.
The only difference between the Democrats and the Republicans is that the Democrats allow the poor to be corrupt, too.
Happiness isn't something you experience; it's something you remember.
There's a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line.
It'd be nice to please everyone but I thought it would be more interesting to have a point of view.
It's not what you are, it's what you don't become that hurts.
Schizophrenia beats dining alone.
When I appeared before the draft board examiner during World War II, he asked me if I thought I could kill. "I don't know about strangers," I replied, "but friends, certainly."
There are two sides to every question: my side and the wrong side.
My last picture for Warners was Romance on the High Seas. It was Doris Day's first picture; that was before she became a virgin.
I was once thrown out of a mental hospital for depressing the other patients.
When I was young I looked like Al Capone, but I lacked his compassion.
I'm a concert pianist, that's a pretentious way of saying I'm unemployed at the moment.
Every time I look at you I get a fierce desire to be lonesome.
Self-pity - it's the only pity that counts.
Underneath this flabby exterior is an enormous lack of character.
[Madame Nhu was] the Sandra Dee of South Vietnam. If I were cast on a desert island with her, I would quickly make friends with the natives.
I've given up reading books. I find it takes my mind off myself.
I'm a study of a man in chaos in search of frenzy.
I envy people who drink. At least they have something to blame everything on.
I'm controversial. My friends either dislike me or hate me
So little time and so little to do.
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