I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.
Treat employees like partners, and they act like partners.
I learned law so well, the day I graduated I sued the college, won the case, and got my tuition back.
I don't have to look up my family tree, because I know that I'm the sap.
It is bad to suppress laughter. It goes back down and spreads to your hips.
An income tax form is like a laundry list - either way you lose your shirt.
If the grass is greener in the other fellow's yard- let him worry about cutting it.
A human being is nothing but a story with skin around it.
Most of us spend the first six days of each week sowing wild oats; then we go to church on Sunday and pray for a crop failure.
If criticism had any power to harm, the skunk would be extinct by now.
Television is a triumph of equipment over people, and the minds that control it are so small that you could put them in a gnat's navel with room left over for two caraway seeds and an agent's heart.
What's on your mind, if you will allow the overstatement.
Imitation is the sincerest form of television.
An advertising agency is 85 percent confusion and 15 percent commission.
He dreamed he was eating shredded wheat and woke up to find the mattress half gone.
Hanging is too good for a man who makes puns; he should be drawn and quoted.
Television is a medium because anything well done is rare.
California is a fine place to live - if you happen to be an orange.
Radio is called a medium because it is rare that anything is well done.
It is probably not love that makes the world go around, but rather those mutually supportive alliances through which partners recognize their dependence on each other for the achievement of shared and private goals.
The world is a grindstone and life is your nose
Some movie stars wear their sunglasses even in church. They're afraid God might recognize them and ask for autographs.
Television is a device that permits people who haven't anything to do to watch people who can't do anything.
The advertising world had space men in it before spacemen existed.
Condensed milk is wonderful. I don't see how they can get a cow to sit down on those little cans.
Follow AzQuotes on Facebook, Twitter and Google+. Every day we present the best quotes! Improve yourself, find your inspiration, share with friends