Ambrose Bierce Quotes - Page 2

• Christian, n.: one who believes that the New Testament is a divinely inspired book admirably suited to the spiritual needs of his neighbor.

  Ambrose Bierce

  Faith, Christian, Spiritual

  Ambrose Bierce (1906). “The Cynic's Word Book”, p.49, Lulu.com

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• Litigation: A machine which you go into as a pig and come out of as a sausage.

  Ambrose Bierce

  Pigs, Law, Machines

  Ambrose Bierce (2013). “Delphi Complete Works of Ambrose Bierce (Illustrated)”, p.2450, Delphi Classics

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• He who thinks with difficulty believes with alacrity.

  Ambrose Bierce

  Believe, Thinking, Alacrity

  Ambrose Bierce (2013). “Delphi Complete Works of Ambrose Bierce (Illustrated)”, p.1216, Delphi Classics

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• Love: A temporary insanity curable by marriage.

  Ambrose Bierce

  Love, Funny, Marriage

  Ambrose Bierce (2001). “The Unabridged Devil's Dictionary”, p.155, University of Georgia Press

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• A popular author is one who writes what the people think. Genius invites them to think something else.

  Ambrose Bierce

  Writing, Thinking, People

  Ambrose Bierce (2012). “The Collected Works of Ambrose Bierce, Volume 8 Epigrams, On With the Dance, Negligible Tales”, p.249, tredition

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• Bore, n. A person who talks when you wish him to listen.

  Ambrose Bierce

  Listening To Others, Bores You, Effective Listening

  Cynic's Word Book (1906) p. 37

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• LAWYER, n. One skilled in circumvention of the law.

  Ambrose Bierce

  Law, Lawyer

  "The Devil's Dictionary". Book by Ambrose Bierce, 1906.

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• They say that hens do cackle loudest when there is nothing vital in the eggs they have laid.

  Ambrose Bierce

  Vanity, Eggs, Hens

  Ambrose Bierce (2009). “The Devil's Dictionary: Easyread Super Large 18pt Edition”, p.379, ReadHowYouWant.com

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• REVOLUTION, n. A bursting of the boilers which usually takes place when the safety valve of public discussion is closed.

  Ambrose Bierce

  Safety, Revolution, Censorship

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• Who never doubted, never half believed. Where doubt is, there truth is - it is her shadow.

  Ambrose Bierce

  Doubt, Shadow, Half

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• A person who doubts himself is like a man who would enlist in the ranks of his enemies and bear arms agains himself. He makes his failure certain by himself being the first person to be convinced of it.

  Ambrose Bierce

  Inspiring, Success, Failure

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• Year: A period of three hundred and sixty-five disappointments.

  Ambrose Bierce

  Disappointment, Years, Three

  Ambrose Bierce (1973). “The Collected Writings of Ambrose Bierce”, Ayer Company Pub

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• In the algebra of psychology, X stands for a woman's heart.

  Ambrose Bierce

  Heart, Funny Relationship, Psychology

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• Philosophy: A route of many roads leading from nowhere to nothing.

  Ambrose Bierce

  Leadership, Philosophy, Math

  Ambrose Bierce (2001). “The Unabridged Devil's Dictionary”, p.181, University of Georgia Press

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• gratitude, n. A sentiment lying midway between a benefit received and a benefit expected.

  Ambrose Bierce

  Gratitude, Lying, Benefits

  Ambrose Bierce (2001). “The Unabridged Devil's Dictionary”, p.100, University of Georgia Press

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• We submit to the majority because we have to. But we are not compelled to call our attitude of subjection a posture of respect.

  Ambrose Bierce

  Attitude, Majority, Posture

  Ambrose Bierce (2013). “Delphi Complete Works of Ambrose Bierce (Illustrated)”, p.2692, Delphi Classics

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• MIND, n. A mysterious form of matter secreted by the brain. Its chief activity consists in the endeavour to ascertain its own nature, the futility of the attempt being due to the fact that it has nothing but itself to know itself with.

  Ambrose Bierce

  Nature, Science, Brain

  Ambrose Bierce (2001). “The Unabridged Devil's Dictionary”, p.164, University of Georgia Press

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  Religion. A daughter of Hope and Fear, explaining to Ignorance the nature of the Unknowable.

  Ambrose Bierce

  Daughter, Religious, Nature

  Ambrose Bierce (2001). “The Unabridged Devil's Dictionary”, p.196, University of Georgia Press

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• Men who expect universal peace through invention of destructive weapons of war are no wiser than one who, noting the improvement of agricultural implements, should prophesy an end to the tilling of the soil.

  Ambrose Bierce

  War, Men, Weapons

  Ambrose Bierce (2013). “Delphi Complete Works of Ambrose Bierce (Illustrated)”, p.2696, Delphi Classics

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• MANNA, n. A food miraculously given to the Israelites in the wilderness. When it was no longer supplied to them they settled down and tilled the soil, fertilizing it, as a rule, with the bodies of the original occupants.

  Ambrose Bierce

  Food, Cooking, Body

  Ambrose Bierce (2011). “Ambrose Bierce: The Devil's Dictionary, Tales, and Memoirs: The Devil's Dictionary, Tales, and Memoirs”, p.720, Library of America

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• Academe, n.: An ancient school where morality and philosophy were taught. Academy, n.: A modern school where football is taught.

  Ambrose Bierce

  Inspirational, Graduation, Sports

  Ambrose Bierce (2001). “The Unabridged Devil's Dictionary”, p.10, University of Georgia Press

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• To the eye of failure success is an accident.

  Ambrose Bierce

  Eye, Success Failure, Accidents

  Ambrose Bierce (2013). “Delphi Complete Works of Ambrose Bierce (Illustrated)”, p.1221, Delphi Classics

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• To be positive is to be mistaken at the top of one's voice.

  Ambrose Bierce

  Positive, Voice, Certainty

  Ambrose Bierce, S. T. Joshi, David E. Schultz (1998). “A Sole Survivor: Bits of Autobiography”, p.18, Univ. of Tennessee Press

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• Happiness has not to all the same name: to Youth she is known as the Future; Age knows her as the Dream.

  Ambrose Bierce

  Happiness, Dream, Names

  Ambrose Bierce (2013). “Delphi Complete Works of Ambrose Bierce (Illustrated)”, p.2691, Delphi Classics

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  Corporation: An ingenious device for obtaining profit without individual responsibility.

  Ambrose Bierce

  Inspirational, Sarcastic, Business

  Ambrose Bierce (2015). “The Eyes of the Panther (Cryptofiction Classics - Weird Tales of Strange Creatures)”, p.20, Read Books Ltd

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