P. G. Wodehouse Quotes - Page 3

Quotes about:

• Rugby football is a game I can't claim absolutely to understand in all its niceties, if you know what I mean. I can follow the broad, general principles, of course. I mean to say, I know that the main scheme is to work the ball down the field somehow and deposit it over the line at the other end and that, in order to squalch this programme, each side is allowed to put in a certain amount of assault and battery and do things to its fellow man which, if done elsewhere, would result in 14 days without the option, coupled with some strong remarks from the Bench.

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Football, Strong, Mean

  29 Copy quote

• The least thing upset him on the links. He missed short putts because of the uproar of the butterflies in the adjoining meadows.

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Butterfly, Golf, Upset

  P. G. Wodehouse (2011). “The Clicking of Cuthbert”, p.128, The Floating Press

  20 Copy quote

• If it were not for quotations, conversations between gentlemen would consist of an endless series of 'what-ho!'s.

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Gentleman, Conversation, Endless

  7 Copy quote

• And she's got brains enough for two, which is the exact quantity the girl who marries you will need.

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Girl, Two, Brain

  P. G. Wodehouse (2008). “The Adventures of Sally (Volume 1 of 2) (EasyRead Super Large 20pt Edition)”, p.207, ReadHowYouWant.com

  12 Copy quote

• I attribute my whole success in life to a rigid observance of the fundamental rule - Never have yourself tattooed with any woman's name, not even her initials.

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Names, Fundamentals, Success In Life

  7 Copy quote

• Always get to the dialogue as soon as possible. I always feel the thing to go for is speed. Nothing puts the reader off more than a big slab of prose at the start.

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Speed, Bigs, Slabs

  10 Copy quote

• I pressed down the mental accelerator. The old lemon throbbed fiercely. I got an idea.

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Ideas, Lemons

  P. G. Wodehouse (2015). “A Wodehouse Miscellany: Articles & Stories”, p.74, Library of Alexandria

  8 Copy quote

• There is only one cure for gray hair. It was invented by a Frenchman. It is called the guillotine.

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Humorous, Hair, Getting Older

  75 Copy quote

• Mike nodded. A sombre nod. The nod Napoleon might have given if somebody had met him in 1812 and said, "So, you're back from Moscow, eh?

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Moscow, Might, Mets

  P. G. Wodehouse (2008). “Mike: A Public School Story: Easyread Large Bold Edition”, p.1, ReadHowYouWant.com

  16 Copy quote

• It is never difficult to distinguish between a Scotsman with a grievance and a ray of sunshine.

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Sunshine, Scotland, Rays

  'Blandings Castle and Elsewhere' (1935) 'The Custody of the Pumpkin'

  64 Copy quote

• When you're alone you don't do much laughing.

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Laughing

  11 Copy quote

• Luck is a goddess not to be coerced and forcibly wooed by those who seek her favours. From such masterful spirits she turns away. But it happens sometimes that, if we put our hand in hers with the humble trust of a little child, she will have pity on us, and not fail us in our hour of need.

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Children, Humble, Good Luck

  P. G. Wodehouse (2009). “A Damsel in Distress: Easyread Super Large 20pt Edition”, p.107, ReadHowYouWant.com

  13 Copy quote

• A certain critic -- for such men, I regret to say, do exist -- made the nasty remark about my last novel that it contained 'all the old Wodehouse characters under different names.' He has probably by now been eaten by bears, like the children who made mock of the prophet Elisha: but if he still survives he will not be able to make a similar charge against Summer Lightning. With my superior intelligence, I have out-generalled the man this time by putting in all the old Wodehouse characters under the same names. Pretty silly it will make him feel, I rather fancy.

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Summer, Children, Regret

  P.G. Wodehouse (2009). “Summer Lightning: (Blandings Castle)”, p.10, Random House

  38 Copy quote

• The drowsy stillness of the afternoon was shattered by what sounded to his strained senses like G.K. Chesterton falling on a sheet of tin.

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Fall, Tin, Afternoon

  P. G. Wodehouse (1992). “Mr. Mulliner Speaking”, Random House (UK)

  12 Copy quote

• Oh, Jeeves,' I said; 'about that check suit.' Yes, sir?' Is it really a frost?' A trifle too bizarre, sir, in my opinion.' But lots of fellows have asked me who my tailor is.' Doubtless in order to avoid him, sir.' He's supposed to be one of the best men in London.' I am saying nothing against his moral character, sir.

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Character, Men, Order

  P. G. Wodehouse (2004). “Introducing Jeeves: Six Classic Stories”, p.65, Courier Corporation

  6 Copy quote

• Intoxicated? The word did not express it by a mile. He was oiled, boiled, fried, plastered, whiffled, sozzled, and blotto.

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Miles, Intoxicated

  13 Copy quote

• One of the Georges - I forget which - once said that a certain number of hours´ sleep each night - I cannot recall at the moment how many - made a man something which for the time being has slipped my memory.

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Memories, Sleep, Night

  P. G. Wodehouse (2012). “Something New: Or, Something Fresh”, p.192, The Floating Press

  23 Copy quote

• What's the use of a great city having temptations if fellows don't yield to them?

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Yield, Cities, Temptation

  P. G. Wodehouse (2015). “My Man Jeeves”, p.29, Booklassic

  19 Copy quote

• As for Gussie Finknottle, many an experienced undertaker would have been deceived by his appearance and started embalming on sight.

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Depression, Sight, Appearance

  P. G. Wodehouse (2015). “Right Ho, Jeeves”, p.76, Booklassic

  8 Copy quote

• I'm all for rational enjoyment, and so forth, but I think a fellow makes himself conspicuous when he throws soft-boiled eggs at the electric fan

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Thinking, Eggs, Fans

  P. G. Wodehouse, David A. Jasen (1997). “Enter Jeeves: 15 Early Stories”, p.84, Courier Corporation

  6 Copy quote

• Oh, I don't know, you know, don't you know?

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Knows

  P. G. Wodehouse (2004). “Introducing Jeeves: Six Classic Stories”, p.139, Courier Corporation

  17 Copy quote

• Why don't you get a haircut? You look like a chrysanthemum.

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Sarcastic, Humorous, Looks

  93 Copy quote

• ...it has been well said that it is precisely these moments when we are feeling that ours is the world and everything that's in it that Fate selects for sneaking up on us with the rock in the stocking.

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Fate, Rocks, Feelings

  P.G. Wodehouse (2009). “Full Moon: (Blandings Castle)”, p.214, Random House

  19 Copy quote

• While not exactly disgruntled, he was far from feeling gruntled. He spoke with a certain what-is-it in his voice, and I could see that, if not actually disgruntled, he was far from being gruntled.

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Voice, Feelings, Spokes

  1938 The Code of the Woosters, ch.1.

  6 Copy quote

• It was one of those cases where you approve the broad, general principle of an idea but can't help being in a bit of a twitter at the prospect of putting it into practical effect. I explained this to Jeeves, and he said much the same thing had bothered Hamlet.

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Ideas, Principles, Jeeves

  P.G. Wodehouse (2017). “Classic Wodehouse”, p.334, Random House

  11 Copy quote

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