Evan Esar Quotes - Page 4

Quotes about:

• The disadvantage of becoming wise is that you realize how foolish you've been.

  Evan Esar

  Wise, Wisdom, Becoming

  9 Copy quote

• A dictator's chief problem is keeping the stomachs of his subjects full while keeping their heads empty.

  Evan Esar

  Problem, Dictator, Empty

  6 Copy quote

• It takes far more courage to violate a custom than a law.

  Evan Esar

  Law, Conformity, Customs

  8 Copy quote

• Some women get divorces on the grounds of incompatibility; others, on just the first two syllables.

  Evan Esar

  Divorce, Two, Firsts

  Evan Esar (1961). “Humorous English: a guide to comic usage, jocular speech and writing, and witty grammar”

  10 Copy quote

• The word impossible is peculiar because if you examine it closely, you'll find that most of it is possible.

  Evan Esar

  Peculiar, Impossible, Ifs

  8 Copy quote

• A hamburger by any other name costs twice as much.

  Evan Esar

  Names, Cost, Hamburgers

  11 Copy quote

• Some people would never get any exercise at all if they didn't have to walk to their cars.

  Evan Esar

  Exercise, People, Car

  5 Copy quote

• Etymology: from Latin ad-, "to" + visum, past participle of videre, "to see". Advice is what you get from your parents when you are growing up, and from your children when you are growing old.

  Evan Esar

  Children, Growing Up, Latin

  13 Copy quote

• If you want to be successful, you must either have a chance or take one.

  Evan Esar

  Successful, Want, Chance

  15 Copy quote

• Good teachers cost a lot; but, poor teachers cost a lot more.

  Evan Esar

  Education, Teacher, Teaching

  11 Copy quote

• A bright eye indicates curiosity; a black eye, too much.

  Evan Esar

  Eye, Black, Curiosity

  12 Copy quote

• You can always tell the golfer who's winning: he's the one who keeps telling his opponent that it's only a game.

  Evan Esar

  Winning, Games, Opponents

  7 Copy quote

• Diets show to what great lengths women will go so as not to go to great widths.

  Evan Esar

  Length, Shows, Diets

  9 Copy quote

• The best way to make a long story short is to stop listening.

  Evan Esar

  Long, Listening, Stories

  9 Copy quote

• Children grow out of childhood, but parents never grow out of parenthood.

  Evan Esar

  Children, Childhood, Parent

  Evan Esar (1978). “The Comic Encyclopedia: A Library of the Literature and History of Humor Containing Thousands of Gags, Sayings, and Stories”, Doubleday Books

  11 Copy quote

• You can't judge the ability of a doctor by the amount of praise the undertakers give him.

  Evan Esar

  Doctors, Giving, Judging

  10 Copy quote

• [Statistics] Fiction in its most uninteresting form.

  Evan Esar

  Science, Technology, Fiction

  Esar's Comic Dictionary

  9 Copy quote

• Sometimes the unexpected happens when you don't expect a person to come up to expectations.

  Evan Esar

  Expectations, Unexpected, Sometimes

  9 Copy quote

• Women diet to retain their girlish figures or their boyish husbands.

  Evan Esar

  Husband, Boyish, Figures

  13 Copy quote

• Communism is a form of society where the less people have to eat, the more they have to swallow.

  Evan Esar

  People, Communism, Form

  11 Copy quote

• The man who avoids debt doesn't have to worry about avoiding his creditors.

  Evan Esar

  Men, Worry, Debt

  9 Copy quote

• There would be no population explosion if people who are trying to keep the wolf from the door wouldn't let the stork fly in through the window.

  Evan Esar

  Doors, People, Trying

  12 Copy quote

• The difference between two men is usually a woman.

  Evan Esar

  Men, Two, Differences

  8 Copy quote

• The man who has a girl in every port is not a sailor but a wholesaler.

  Evan Esar

  Girl, Men, Sailor

  Evan Esar (1961). “Humorous English: a guide to comic usage, jocular speech and writing, and witty grammar”

  12 Copy quote

• A man is known by the company he keeps, but a woman is known by the company she keeps waiting.

  Evan Esar

  Men, Waiting, Company

  11 Copy quote

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