What we love about love is the fever, which marriage puts to bed and cures.
Happiness is like the penny candy of our youth: we got a lot more for our money back when we had no money.
We are keenly aware of the faults of our friends, but if they like us enough it doesn't matter.
It must infuriate our children to see us always so much more forbearing with everybody else's.
Your children tell you casually years later what it would have killed you with worry to know at the time.
If you jot down every silly thought that pops into your mind, you will soon find out everything you most seriously believe.
Acedia is not in every dictionary; just in every heart.
Puritans will never believe it, but life is full of disagreeable things that aren't even good for you.
Many are saved from sin by being so inept at it.
Age is a slowing down of everything except fear.
Our strength is often composed of the weakness that we're damned if we're going to show.
If you're a gifted flirt, talking about the price of eggs will do as well as any other subject.
Those who are brutally honest are seldom so with themselves.
We come late, if at all, to wine and philosophy: whiskey and action are easier.
Be glad that you're greedy; the national economy would collapse if you weren't.
If you see in your children most of your own faults, you have failed as a parent, but succeeded as a neurotic.
Neurotics make poor patriots; if you're ashamed of something as big as yourself, it's hard to be proud of something as small as your country.
The only mothers it is safe to forget on Mother's Day are the good ones.
If the pain wanders, do not waste your time with doctors.
A car is useless in New York, essential everywhere else. The same with good manners.
The way the neurotic sees it: bars on his door mean that he's locked in; bars on your door mean that he's locked out.
We are irritated by rascals, intolerant of fools, and prepared to love the rest. But where are they?
The neurotic doesn't know how to cope with his emotional bills; some he keeps paying over and over, others he never pays at all.
Learn a little of anything, and you're ready to proselytize.
No matter how brilliantly an idea is stated, we will not really be moved unless we have already half thought of it ourselves.
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