They call it golf because all the other four-letter words were taken.
As you walk down the fairway of life you must smell the roses, for you only get to play one round.
If you think it's hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball.
Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps.
A kid grows up a lot faster on the golf course. Golf teaches you how to behave.
The most important shot in golf is the next one.
The difference between golf and government is that in golf you can't improve your lie.
May thy ball lie in green pastures, and not in still waters.
It's good sportsmanship to not pick up lost golf balls while they are still rolling.
Golf combines two favorite American pastimes: taking long walks and hitting things with a stick.
Golf is a hard game to figure. One day you will go out and slice it and shank it, hit into all the traps and miss every green. The next day you go out and, for no reason at all, you really stink.
Art said he wanted to get more distance. I told him to hit it and run backward.
Golf is a lot of walking, broken up by disappointment and bad arithmetic.
Competitive golf is played mainly on a five-and-a-half-inch course... the space between your ears.
If you watch a game, it's fun. If you play it, it's recreation. If you work at it, it's golf.
Don't play too much golf. Two rounds a day are plenty.
Golf and sex are about the only things you can enjoy without being good at it.
I have a tip that can take 5 strokes off anyone's golf game. It's called an eraser.
The only time my prayers are never answered is on the golf course.
If you drink don't drive. Don't even putt.
The uglier a man's legs are, the better he plays golf - it's almost a law.
These greens are so fast I have to hold my putter over the ball and hit it with the shadow.
Golf is a day spent in a round of strenuous idleness.
Reverse every natural instinct and do the opposite of what you are inclined to do, and you will probably come very close to having a perfect golf swing.
Putts get real difficult the day they hand out the money.
Follow AzQuotes on Facebook, Twitter and Google+. Every day we present the best quotes! Improve yourself, find your inspiration, share with friends