Funny Golf Quotes - Page 6

• The golf swing is like a suitcase into which we are trying to pack one too many things.

  John Updike

  Golf, Swings, Trying

  John Updike (2009). “More Matter: Essays and Criticism”, p.124, Random House

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• If there is any larceny in a man, golf will bring it out.

  Paul Gallico

  Golf, Men, Handicaps

  Paul Gallico (2015). “Farewell to Sport”, p.165, Open Road Media

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• In golf as in life, it's the follow through that makes the difference.

  Ben Wicks

  Golf, Differences, Follow Through

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• I would like to deny all allegations by Bob Hope that during my last game of golf, I hit an eagle, a birdie, an elk and a moose.

  Gerald R. Ford

  Dirty, Golf, Eagles

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• I guess there is nothing that will get your mind off everything like golf. I have never been depressed enough to take up the game, but they say you get so sore at yourself you forget to hate your enemies.

  Will Rogers

  Funny, Sports, Hate

  Quoted in Michael HobbsThe Golf Quotation Book (1992).

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• Columbus went around the world in 1492. That isn't a lot of strokes when you consider the course.

  Lee Trevino

  Dirty, Golf, Gold

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• Golf is a game that needlessly prolongs the lives of some of our most useless citizens.

  Bob Hope

  Funny, Hope, Golf

  48 Copy quote

• Concentration comes out of a combination of confidence and hunger.

  Arnold Palmer

  Motivational, Sports, Golf

  FaceBook post by Arnold Palmer from Oct 04, 2016

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• I don't like to watch golf on television because I can't stand people who whisper.

  David Brenner

  Golf, People, Watches

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• My body is here, but my mind has already teed off.

  Keith Michael

  Golf, Mind, Body

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• Putting allows the touchy golfer two to four opportunities to blow a gasket in the short space of two to forty feet.

  Tommy Bolt

  Funny, Dirty, Golf

  "Golf: The Game of Lessening Failures". Book by Bob Glanville, 2010.

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• I never felt that I didn't have a chance to win.

  Arnold Palmer

  Sports, Perseverance, Golf

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• I went to play golf and tried to shoot my age, but I shot my weight instead.

  Bob Hope

  Golf, Play, Age

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• Golf combines two favorite American pastimes: taking long walks and hitting things with a stick.

  P. J. O'Rourke

  Golf, Long Walks, Two

  P. J. O'Rourke (2007). “Modern Manners: An Etiquette Book for Rude People”, p.265, Grove/Atlantic, Inc.

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• Golf is a lot of walking, broken up by disappointment and bad arithmetic.

  Earl Wilson

  Disappointment, Golf, Broken

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• Art said he wanted to get more distance. I told him to hit it and run backward.

  Ken Venturi

  Running, Art, Distance

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• The best advice I can give for playing a ball out of water is - don't.

  Tony Lema

  Golf, Giving, Water

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• I don't fear death, but I sure don't like those three-footers for par.

  Chi Chi Rodriguez

  Golf, Three, Fear Of Death

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• Golf is assuredly a mystifying game. It would seem that if a person has hit a golf ball correctly a thousand times, he should be able to duplicate the performance at will. But such is certainly not the case.

  Bobby Jones

  Golf, Games, Balls

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• I was three over. One over a house, one over a patio, and one over a swimming pool.

  George Brett

  Golf, Swimming, House

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• Go play golf. Go to the golf course. Hit the ball. Find the ball. Repeat until the ball is in the hole. Have fun. The end.

  Chuck Hogan

  Funny, Golf, Play

  Chuck Hogan (1993). “Learning Golf: The How-To-Learn Book for Aspiring Golfers”, Sports Enhancement Assocs

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• Golf tip: Lay off for three weeks and then quit for good.

  Sam Snead

  Golf, Three, Quitting

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• You know what they say about big hitters...the woods are full of them.

  Jimmy Demaret

  Funny, Sports, Golf

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• If I'm on the course and lightning starts, I get inside fast. If God wants to play through, let him.

  Bob Hope

  Dirty, Golf, Play

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• The more I practice, the luckier I get.

  Jerry Barber

  Sports, Volleyball, Golf

  46 Copy quote