Wit Quotes - Page 2

• The ability to quote is a serviceable substitute for wit.

  W. Somerset Maugham

  Inspirational, Funny, Science

  18 Copy quote

• The most brilliant flashes of wit come from a clouded mind, as lightning leaps only from an obscure firmament.

  Christian Nestell Bovee

  Mind, Lightning, Brilliant

  7 Copy quote

• What quick wit is found in sudden straits!

  Martial

  Quick Wit, Found

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• I cannot imagine why we should be at the expense to furnish wit for succeeding ages, when the former have made no sort of provision for ours.

  Jonathan Swift

  Age, Succeed, Imagine

  Jonathan Swift, Thomas Roscoe (1859). “The works of Jonathan Swift, D.D.: with copious notes and additions and a memoir of the author”, p.273

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• Perpetual aiming at wit is a very bad part of conversation. It is done to support a character: it generally fails; it is a sort of insult on the company, and a restraint upon the speaker.

  Jonathan Swift

  Character, Support, Done

  7 Copy quote

• The impromptu reply is precisely the touchstone of the man of wit.

  Moliere

  Men, He Man, Touchstones

  8 Copy quote

• From Lucifer to Jerry Sneak there is not an aspect of evil, imperfection, and littleness which can elude the lights of humor or the lightning of wit.

  Edwin Percy Whipple

  Light, Evil, Imperfection

  Edwin Percy Whipple (1859). “Lectures on Subjects Connected with Literature and Life”, p.125

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• Nature and society are so replete with startling contrasts that wit often consists in the mere statement and comparison of facts, as when Hume says that the ancient Muscovites wedded their wives with a whip instead of a ring.

  Edwin Percy Whipple

  Wife, Facts, Ancient

  Edwin Percy Whipple (1851). “Literature and life, lects”, p.43

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• The essence of the ludicrous consists in surprise,--in unexpected terms of feeling and explosions of thought,--often bringing dissimilar things together with a shock; as when some wit called Boyle, the celebrated philosopher, the father of chemistry and brother of the Earl of Cork.

  Edwin Percy Whipple

  Brother, Father, Essence

  7 Copy quote

• Wit implies hatred or contempt of folly and crime, produces its effects by brisk shocks of surprise, uses the whip of scorpions and the branding-iron, stabs, stings, pinches, tortures, goads, teases, corrodes, undermines.

  Edwin Percy Whipple

  Iron, Hatred, Scorpions

  Edwin Percy Whipple (1851). “Literature and life, lects”, p.46

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• Wit is an unexpected explosion of thought.

  Edwin Percy Whipple

  Unexpected, Explosions

  7 Copy quote

• Wits, like drunken men with swords, are apt to draw their steel upon their best acquaintances.

  Douglas William Jerrold

  Men, Steel, Acquaintance

  Douglas William Jerrold (1853). “Punch's letters to his son, Punch's complete letter writer, and Sketches of the English”, p.286

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• A nickel ain't worth a dime anymore.

  Yogi Berra

  Funny, Baseball, Money

  Yogi Berra (1998). “The Yogi Book”, p.26, Workman Publishing

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• The future ain't what it used to be.

  Yogi Berra

  Baseball, Future, Yankees

  Yogi Berra (2010). “What Time Is It? You Mean Now?: Advice for Life from the Zennest Master of Them All”, p.6, Simon and Schuster

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• If you come to a fork in the road, take it.

  Yogi Berra

  Funny, Happiness, Baseball

  Yogi: It Ain't Over (1989)

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• 

  If you don't know where you are going, you might wind up someplace else.

  Yogi Berra

  Inspirational, Funny, Success

  "Yogi Berra, baseball Hall of Famer and New York Yankees catcher, dies at 90" by Alan Evans, www.theguardian.com. September 23, 2015.

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• I'm not going to buy my kids an encyclopedia. Let them walk to school like I did.

  Yogi Berra

  Baseball, School, Kids

  "Yogi Berra: The greatest financial planner ever?" by Ric Edelman, www.cnbc.com. January 25, 2016.

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• He hits from both sides of the plate. He's amphibious.

  Yogi Berra

  Funny, Baseball, Yankees

  56 Copy quote

• Wit - the salt with which the American humorist spoils his intellectual cookery by leaving it out.

  Ambrose Bierce

  Native American, Humor, Leaving

  Ambrose Bierce (2001). “The Unabridged Devil's Dictionary”, p.238, University of Georgia Press

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• A wise man will live as much within his wit as within his income.

  Lord Chesterfield

  Wise, Men, Advice

  Lord Chesterfield, David Roberts (2008). “Lord Chesterfield's Letters”, p.346, Oxford University Press

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• The witty woman is a tragic figure in American life. Wit destroys eroticism and eroticism destroys wit, so women must choose between taking lovers and taking no prisoners.

  Florence King

  Love, Witty, Figures

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• Less judgment than wit is more sail than ballast.

  William Penn

  Inspirational, Funny, Sailing

  Benjamin Franklin, William Penn (2012). “Franklin's Way to Wealth and Penn's Maxims”, p.38, Courier Corporation

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• He is winding the watch of his wit; by and by it will strike.

  William Shakespeare

  Memorable, Watches, Tempest

  'The Tempest' (1611) act 2, sc. 1, l. [12]

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• Wit lies in recognizing the resemblance among things which differ and the difference between things which are alike.

  Madame de Stael

  Lying, Resemblance Is, Differences

  "Germany". Book by Madame de Stael, 1813.

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• Always forgive your enemies - nothing annoys them so much.

  Oscar Wilde

  Love, Inspirational, Funny

  Oscar Wilde (1947). “The Happy Prince”, p.16, New Line Publishing

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