You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.
Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.
The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age.
Age is strictly a case of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.
A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age.
There is still no cure for the common birthday.
Time and tide wait for no man.
Time and tide wait for no man, but time always stands still for a woman of 30.
Just remember, once you're over the hill you begin to pick up speed.
Like many women my age, I am 28 years old.
The best way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once.
You're only young once, but you can be immature forever.
The best birthdays of all are those that haven't arrived yet.
They tell you that you'll lose your mind when you grow older. What they don't tell you is that you won't miss it very much.
Old age isn't so bad when you consider the alternative.
There are three hundred and sixty-four days when you might get un-birthday presents, and only one for birthday presents, you know.
Growing old is like being increasingly penalized for a crime you haven't committed.
A friend never defends a husband who gets his wife an electric skillet for her birthday.
If we could be twice young and twice old we could correct all our mistakes.
I believe in loyalty. When a woman reaches an age she likes, she should stick with it.