Funny Love Quotes - Page 5

• Love is the delusion that one woman differs from another.

  H. L. Mencken

  Love, Delusional, Love Is

  A Little Book in C Major ch. 1 (1916)

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• Don't let love interfere with your appetite. It never does with mine.

  Anthony Trollope

  Food, Cooking, Doe

  Anthony Trollope (2016). “Anthony Trollope: The Chronicles of Barsetshire & The Palliser Novels (Unabridged): The Warden + The Barchester Towers + Doctor Thorne + Framley Parsonage + The Small House at Allington + The Last Chronicle of Barset + Can You Forgive Her? + The Prime Minister + Eustace Diamonds...”, p.606, e-artnow (Open Publishing)

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• Bachelors know more about women than married men; if they didn't they'd be married too.

  H. L. Mencken

  Funny, Anniversary, Marriage

  H.L. Mencken “A little book in C major”, Рипол Классик

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• Bisexuality doubles your chances of a date on a Saturday night.
  I believe that sex is a beautiful thing between two people. Between five, it's fantastic.
  If there is reincarnation, I'd like to come back as Warren Beatty's fingertips.
  I'm such a good lover because I practice a lot on my own.
  My love life is terrible. The last time I was inside a woman was when I visited the Statue of Liberty.
  Sex without love is an empty experience, but as empty experiences go it's a pretty good one.

  Woody Allen

  Love, Funny, Beautiful

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• It is astonishing how little one feels alone when one loves.

  John Bulwer

  Love, Romantic, Valentines Day

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• To love is to suffer. To avoid suffering one must not love. But then one suffers from not loving. Therefore, to love is to suffer; not to love is to suffer; to suffer is to suffer. To be happy is to love. To be happy, then, is to suffer, but suffering makes one unhappy. Therefore, to be happy one must love or love to suffer or suffer from too much happiness.

  Woody Allen

  Love, Funny, Life

  Love and Death, www.imdb.com. 1975.

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• If it's true that men are such beasts, this must account for the fact that most women are animal lovers.

  Doris Day

  Live Life, Animal, Men

  "Biography/ Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

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• A woman has got to love a bad man once or twice in her life, to be thankful for a good one.

  Marjorie Kinnan Rawlings

  Love, Funny, Life

  Marjorie Kinnan Rawlings (2011). “The Yearling”, p.176, Simon and Schuster

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• I wasn't kissing her, I was whispering in her mouth!

  Leonard Marx

  Funny, Best Love, Love You

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• I love you like a fat kid love cake.

  Curtis Jackson

  Rap, Love You, Kids

  "Where Do I Start With 50 Cent?" by Dee Lockett, www.slate.com. June 6, 2014.

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• Love is so confusing - you tell a girl she looks great and what's the first thing you do? Turn out the lights!

  Robert Orben

  Girl, Confused, Love Is

  Robert Orben (2012). “2500 Jokes to Start 'Em Laughing”, p.113, Doubleday

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  There are only three things women need in life: food, water, and compliments.

  Chris Rock

  Funny, Hilarious, Laughter

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• Husbands are like fires - they go out when they're left unattended.

  Cher

  Love, Husband, Fire

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• What the world really needs is more love and less paper work.

  Pearl Bailey

  Love, Romantic, Valentines Day

  "Weekly World News" Magazine, Vol. 26, No. 33, April 25, 2005.

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• Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who'll give you a little love, a little affection, a little tenderness? It means you're in the wrong house, that's what it means.

  Henny Youngman

  Funny, Marriage, Women

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• If I had no sense of humor I should long ago have committed suicide.

  Mahatma Gandhi

  Inspirational, Wise, Suicide

  "The Essential Gandhi: An Anthology of His Writings on His Life, Work, and Ideas".

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• Today is Valentine's Day - or, as men like to call it, Extortion Day!

  Jay Leno

  Funny, Romantic, Valentines Day

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• Love is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.

  H. L. Mencken

  Love, Funny, Marriage

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• If I eat a huge meal and I can get the girl to rub my belly, I think that's about as romantic as I can think of.

  Ryan Gosling

  Romantic, Girl, Thinking

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• Love ain't nothing but sex misspelled.

  Harlan Ellison

  Love, Sex, Sex And Love

  Harlan Ellison (1975). “Deathbird stories: a Pantheon of modern gods”, HarperCollins Publishers

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  I thought I was promiscuous, but it turns out I was just thorough.

  Russell Brand

  Love You, Romantic Love, Thorough

  "Baby fever for Russell Brand?" by Simon Perry, www.cnn.com. December 7, 2009.

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• True love comes quietly, without banners or flashing lights. If you hear bells, get your ears checked.

  Erich Segal

  Love, Inspiring, Valentines Day

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  Real love amounts to withholding the truth, even when you're offered the perfect opportunity to hurt someone's feelings.

  David Sedaris

  Hurt, Real, Love You

  «At The Movies With David & Sarah» by David Sedaris, www.esquire.com. January 29, 2007.

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• We'll love you just the way you are if you're perfect.

  Alanis Morissette

  Love, Funny, Sarcastic

  Song: Perfect, Album: Jagged Little Pill, 1995

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• Love is a state of mind which has nothing to do with the mind.

  Bob Phillips

  Love, Mind, States

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