Funny Old Age Birthday Quotes

• As you get older three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I can't remember the other two.

  Norman Wisdom

  Funny, Birthday, Memories

  "Biography/Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

  1517 Copy quote

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• Age is strictly a case of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.

  Jack Benny

  Funny, Happy Birthday, Elderly

  New York Times, 1974.

  49 Copy quote

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• Youth is the gift of nature, but age is a work of art.

  Stanislaw Jerzy Lec

  Birthday, Art, Lost Youth

  89 Copy quote

• Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional.

  Chili Davis

  Love, Happy Birthday, Happiness

  101 Copy quote

• You're birthday reminds me of the old Chinese scholar..... Yung No Mo

  Dana Rosemary Scallon

  Happy Birthday, Chinese, My Birthday

  42 Copy quote

• You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.

  Bob Hope

  Funny, Happy Birthday, Humorous

  Biography/Personal Quotes, www.imdb.com.

  56 Copy quote

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• Today you are you! That is truer than true! There is no one alive who is you-er than you!

  Dr. Seuss

  Inspirational, Funny, Life

  "Happy Birthday to You!". Book by Dr. Seuss, 1959.

  195 Copy quote

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• You're only young once, but you can be immature forever.

  Germaine Greer

  Life, Happy Birthday, Happiness

  271 Copy quote

• Men are like wine - some turn to vinegar, but the best improve with age.

  Pope John XXIII

  Birthday, Drinking, Wine

  105 Copy quote

• By the time you're eighty years old you've learned everything. You only have to remember it.

  Bill Vaughan

  Funny, Witty, Elderly

  25 Copy quote

• Age is something that doesn't matter unless you're a cheese

  Luis Bunuel

  Funny, Cheese Sandwiches, 50th Birthday

  20 Copy quote

• I'm at an age when my back goes out more than I do.

  Phyllis Diller

  Cute, Birthday, Funny Relationship

  Phyllis Diller (1981). “The joys of aging--and how to avoid them: can sex keep you young? And other silly questions”, Doubleday Books

  15 Copy quote

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• Growing old is like being increasingly penalized for a crime you haven't committed.

  Pierre Teilhard de Chardin

  Birthday, Growing Up, Getting Older

  71 Copy quote

• Age is not important unless you're a cheese.

  Helen Hayes

  Birthday, Age, Important

  15 Copy quote

• Old age is like everything else. To make a success of it, you've got to start young.

  Theodore Roosevelt

  Happy Birthday, Funny Birthday, Congratulations

  Theodore Roosevelt (2015). “Theodore Roosevelt on Bravery: Lessons from the Most Courageous Leader of the Twentieth Century”, p.7, Skyhorse Publishing, Inc.

  73 Copy quote

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• The seven ages of man: spills, drills, thrills, bills, ills, pills and wills.

  Richard J. Needham

  Birthday, Men, Age

  16 Copy quote

• Nobody grows old merely by living a number of years. We grow old by deserting our ideals. Years may wrinkle the skin, but to give up enthusiasm wrinkles the soul.

  Samuel Ullman

  Life, Birthday, Leadership

  145 Copy quote

• Old age is like a plane flying through a storm. Once you're aboard, there's nothing you can do.

  Golda Meir

  Funny, Birthday, Women

  "Biography/Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

  16 Copy quote

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• 

  How old would you be if you didn't know how old you are?

  Satchel Paige

  Happy Birthday, Baseball, Fun

  Quoted in Garson Kanin, It Takes a Long Time to Become Young (1978)

  160 Copy quote

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• They tell you that you'll lose your mind when you grow older. What they don't tell you is that you won't miss it very much.

  Malcolm Cowley

  Birthday, Missing You, Mind

  Malcolm Cowley (1982). “The view from 80”, Penguin Books, 1982

  14 Copy quote

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• You know you're getting old when you get that one candle on the cake. It's like, 'See if you can blow this out.'

  Jerry Seinfeld

  Happy Birthday, Funny Birthday, Blow

  13 Copy quote
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  The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age.

  Lucille Ball

  Happy Birthday, Beauty, Funny Birthday

  170 Copy quote

• If you survive long enough, you're revered - rather like an old building.

  Katharine Hepburn

  Birthday, Old Buildings, Long

  "Biography/ Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

  9 Copy quote

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• Youth is a disease from which we all recover.

  Dorothy Fuldheim

  Happy Birthday, Getting Older, Age

  "Why brands side-line the over-50s at their peril" by Crispin Reed, www.theguardian.com. November 28, 2013.

  16 Copy quote

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• Some turn to vinegar, but the best improve with age.

  C. E. M. Joad

  Birthday, Wine, Turning 50

  16 Copy quote