Moron Quotes - Page 8

• Always Postpone Meetings with Time-wasting Morons

  Scott Adams

  Wasting Time, Meetings

  Scott Adams (2012). “Teamwork Means You Can't Pick the Side that's Right”, p.2, Andrews McMeel Publishing

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• Anyone who says that Iran will commit suicide with its nuclear power is a moron and has no business in discussion.

  Reza Aslan

  Suicide, Iran, Nuclear

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• [C]lass consciousness is not one of our national diseases; we suffer, indeed, from its opposite-the delusion that class barriers are not real. That delusion reveals itself in many forms, some of them as beautiful as a glass eye. One is the Liberal doctrine that a prairie demagogue promoted to the United States Senate will instantly show all the sagacity of a Metternich ... another is the doctrine that a moronrun through a university and decorated with a Ph.D. will cease thereby to be a moron.

  H. L. Mencken

  Beautiful, Real, Eye

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• President George] Bush talked to us like we were a bunch of morons and we ate it up. Can you imagine, the Pledge of Allegiance, read my lips-can you imagine such crap in this day and age?

  John Updike

  Age, President, Lips

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• Vaudeville could not vouch for the honesty, the integrity, or the mentality of the individuals who collectively made up the horde the medium embraced. All the human race demands of its members is that they be born. That is all vaudeville demanded. You just had to be born. You could be ignorant and be a star. You could be a moron and be wealthy. The elements that went to make up vaudeville were combed from the jungles, the four corners of the world, the intelligentsia and the subnormal.

  Fred Allen

  Stars, Honesty, Integrity

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• There are now unmistakeable signs of a trend in favor of superior products at premium prices. The consumer is not a moron, she is your wife.

  David Ogilvy

  Wife, Favors, Trends

  "Ogilvy on Advertising". Book by David Ogilvy, p.170, 1983.

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• John Kerry made a joke about Bush being a moron, and now Bush wants morons to think it was a joke was about the troops. ... Now, John Kerry has apologized. He said he made a botched joke and admitted that he has a joking problem. He has checked into an improv group and revealed that as a child, he was molested by a clown.

  Bill Maher

  Children, Thinking, Want

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• But we live in an age, ladies and gentlemen, where we are keeping morons alive in our gene pools by putting warnings on items that should not require warnings. The hotel I am staying in has a hair dryer, on the cord of the hair dryer there is a warning and this is what it says: “Warning! Do not use in shower!” Ladies and gentlemen if you have a friend who wants to use their hair dryer in the shower, you let them.

  Wil Anderson

  Hair, Gentleman, Age

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• The townspeople are morons, yokels, peasants and genus homo boobiensis...surrounded by gaping primates from the upland vallies.

  H. L. Mencken

  Modern Life, Primates, Peasants

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• So, too, if, to our surprise, we should meet one of these morons whose remarks are so conspicuous a part of the folklore of the world of the radio--remarks made without using either the tongue or the brain, spouted much like the spoutings of small whales--we should recognize him as below the level of nature but not as below the level of the imagination.

  Wallace Stevens

  Whales, Imagination, Brain

  Wallace Stevens (2011). “The Necessary Angel: Essays on Reality and the Imagination”, p.74, Vintage

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• Our civilisation cannot afford to let the censor-moron loose. The censor-moron does not really hate anything but the living and growing human consciousness.

  D. H. Lawrence

  Hate, Civilization, Doe

  D. H. Lawrence, James T. Boulton (2000). “The Selected Letters of D. H. Lawrence”, p.414, Cambridge University Press

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• It seems to me like a perversion of talent for an artist of any kind to further the corporate structure of America or the personal interests of the morons and thieves who run it.

  George Carlin

  Running, Artist, America

  Interview with Sam Merrill, reprints.longform.org. January 1982.

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• I am still mostly a moron, I do get into bad moods, I am not a perfected being.

  Dan Harris

  Bad Mood, Mood, Stills

  Interview with Maranda Pleasant, www.marandapleasantmedia.com.

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• I had become too accustomed to the pseudo-Left new style, whereby if your opponent thought he had identified your lowest possible motive, he was quite certain that he had isolated the only real one. This vulgar method, which is now the norm and the standard in much non-Left journalism as well, is designed to have the effect of making any noisy moron into a master analyst.

  Christopher Hitchens

  Real, Style, Opponents

  Christopher Hitchens (2010). “Hitch 22: A Memoir”, p.270, Atlantic Books Ltd

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• Ranger sent us to check on you," Hal said. "We just got here, and we heard shots." "Some moron ate my jelly doughnut," Lula said. "So I shot him.

  Janet Evanovich

  Jelly, Checks, Shots

  Janet Evanovich (2010). “Sizzling Sixteen”, p.24, Macmillan

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• I don’t wanna die, man. They’re not playing. Have you seen how many of them are out there? One just took a shot at me, so unlike you morons, I’m hiding. Hiding is nice. (Vik)

  Sherrilyn Kenyon

  Nice, Men, Hiding

  Sherrilyn Kenyon (2009). “Born of Fire”, p.339, Macmillan

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• When we got to the moron who was sitting in the only path to the stairway, Adam caught my waist and lifted me over before stepping over the man himself. “Scott?” Adam said as we headed upstairs. “Yeah?” “Unless someone shoots you, skins you, and throws the results on the floor, I don’t want to see you lying in the walkway again.” “Yessir!

  Patricia Briggs

  Lying, Men, Skins

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• I'm sure that there must have been times when you have read books or watched films and found yourself secretly wishing for the villain to win. Why? Isn't that against the rules by which our society lives? Why should you feel this way? It's simple, really; the villain is the true hero of these tales, not the well-intentioned moron who somehow foils their diabolical scheme. The villain get's all the best lines, has the best costumes, has unlimited power and wealth- why on earth would anyone not want to be the villain?

  Mark Walden

  Book, Hero, Winning

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• I felt the little beads of sweat pooling on my temple. Sit here and look nice...I could do that. But answer questions? I knew I wasn't going to win this little game; that wasn't the issue. I just really, really didn't want to look like a moron in front of the entire country.

  Kiera Cass

  Country, Nice, Winning

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• What a moron I was to think you were sweet and innocent, when it turns out you were actually college-educated the whole time!

  Margaret Atwood

  Sweet, College, Thinking

  Margaret Atwood (1987). “The edible woman ; Surfacing ; Lady oracle”, Treasure Press

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• I was a fool!" Percy roared, so loudly that Lupin nearly dropped his photograph. "I was an idiot, I was a pompous prat, I was a - a -" "Ministry-loving, family-disowning, power-hungry moron," said Fred. Percy swallowed. "Yes, I was!" "Well, you can't say fairer than that," said Fred, holding out his hand to Percy.

  J. K. Rowling

  Hands, Ministry, Fool

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• Rule number one: Never make anyone uncomfortable in your home-even morons.

  Mary Matalin

  Home, Numbers, Politics

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• People would be in hysterics if they saw that. It's like, wow, he's a superhuman moron.... So he wears lipstick, has a little bouffant, and does little circus acts as well. Oh, he's so sexy.

  Robert Pattinson

  Funny, Sexy, People

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• I'm a moron because I don't want to lie in a gutter puking over myself... yeah right

  Davey Havok

  Lying, Gutters, Want

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• Whatever it took to get elected president of the United States, I don't think being a complete and utter moron is one of those predicates.

  James Woods

  Thinking, President, United States

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