Tim Vine Quotes - Page 3

Quotes about:

• You see my next door neighbour worships exhaust pipes, he's a catholic converter.

  Tim Vine

  Funny, Humor, Doors

  6 Copy quote

• I'd like to start with the chimney jokes - I've got a stack of them. The first one is on the house.

  Tim Vine

  House, Firsts, Chimneys

  "Tim Vine wins Dave award for funniest joke of Edinburgh fringe festival" by Hannah Ellis-Petersen, www.theguardian.com. August 18, 2014.

  5 Copy quote

• People ask 'do you make a conscious effort not to swear?' - if you're doing silly stuff you're not tempted to put swearing in. All the comics from my childhood, who were funny without swearing, were the people that influenced me. What I do is quite traditional anyway.

  Tim Vine

  Silly, People, Childhood

  7 Copy quote

• So I went to buy a watch, and the man in the shop said "Analogue." I said "No, just a watch."

  Tim Vine

  Funny, Humor, Men

  12 Copy quote

• I'm not someone who gets to play The O2 and places like that, but that's the kind of rock and roll venue. The popularity of stand-up means that some people are getting to play rock star venues.

  Tim Vine

  Stars, Mean, Rocks

  4 Copy quote

• People think that because of my act that I must have a really busy mind and I must be driven. I really am not. I quite like going outside and looking at spiders on a hedge in my garden and stuff.

  Tim Vine

  Garden, Thinking, People

  4 Copy quote

• As you get older you're told to be sensible, but it's important for writing if you're a comic that you're able to still access that childlike thing.

  Tim Vine

  Writing, Important, Able

  8 Copy quote

• You know, I'm not very good at magic - I can only do half of a trick. Yes - I'm a member of the Magic Semi-circle.

  Tim Vine

  Funny, Humor, Circles

  4 Copy quote

• Comedy covers such a wide range of different styles that I'm not really qualified to talk on all of them any more than anyone else is.

  Tim Vine

  Style, Different, Comedy

  4 Copy quote

• I've got a sponge front door. Hey, don't knock it.

  Tim Vine

  Funny, Humor, Doors

  Tim Vine (2012). “The (Not Quite) Biggest Ever Tim Vine Joke Book: Children's Edition”, p.20, Random House

  4 Copy quote

• I sit in places like Costa Coffee in Banstead and write rubbish. I need a deadline. I think about the 44 tour dates and keep imagining standing in front of all these people. Then every day I write 15 jokes minimum.

  Tim Vine

  Coffee, Writing, Thinking

  11 Copy quote

• One of the things I like about when I tour sometimes is that occasionally you'll see a dad there with his 12-year-old son and they're both enjoying it.

  Tim Vine

  Dad, Son, Years

  6 Copy quote

• If you do weave one-liners into a story, you have to have an overall story as well, otherwise it doesn't really count as narrative.

  Tim Vine

  Stories, Narrative, One Liner

  8 Copy quote

• For one thing, I don’t pun excessively in real life.

  Tim Vine

  Real, Real Life, Pun

  "Jeremy and Tim Vine - the unlikeliest double-act around". Saga Magazine Interview, www.saga.co.uk. August 20, 2014.

  4 Copy quote

• I love acting, but it's all just a bonus.

  Tim Vine

  Acting, Bonus

  7 Copy quote

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