If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will achieve, its full potential, that word would be 'meetings.'
I like work; it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours.
I always arrive late at the office, but I make up for it by leaving early.
Why do people say they wish every day was Friday? If it was always Friday, we'd be here every freakin' day.
Work is the greatest thing in the world, so we should always save some of it for tomorrow.
The brain is a wonderful organ; it starts working the moment you get up in the morning and does not stop until you get into the office.
One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief that one's work is terribly important.
Hard work spotlights the character of people: some turn up their sleeves, some turn up their noses, and some don't turn up at all.
In the early days all I hoped was to make a living out of what I did best. But, since there's no real market for masturbation I had to fall back on my bass playing abilities.
Work is against human nature. The proof is that it makes us tired.
Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.
The only place success comes before work is in the dictionary.
Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now quiet! They're about to announce the lottery numbers.
Anyone who can walk to the welfare office can walk to work.
I used to sell furniture for a living. The trouble was, it was my own.
People who work sitting down get paid more than people who work standing up.
Ambition is a poor excuse for not having sense enough to be lazy.
I work for myself, which is fun. Except when I call in sick, I know I'm lying.
No man goes before his time - unless the boss leaves early.
A guy gave me a job at an information booth - no questions asked.
It's a shame that the only thing a man can do for eight hours a day is work. He can't eat for eight hours; he can't drink for eight hours; he can't make love for eight hours. The only thing a man can do for eight hours is work.
Most of what we call management consists of making it difficult for people to get their work done.
Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there.
The elevator to success is out of order. You'll have to use the stairs... one step at a time.
Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance?
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