Woody Allen Quotes - Page 5

Quotes about:

• I've become the person I've always hated, but I'm happier.

  Woody Allen

  Feelings, Hated, Persons

  "Fictional character: Robin Simon". "Celebrity", www.imdb.com. 1998.

  18 Copy quote

• The only thing standing between me and greatness is me.

  Woody Allen

  Witty, Humorous, Greatness

  Woody Allen (2006). “Woody Allen: Interviews”

  24 Copy quote

• Who's the bigger idiot, the idiot or the idiot who gets fooled by the idiot?

  Woody Allen

  Idiot, Bigger, Fooled

  45 Copy quote

• I think crime pays. The hours are good, you travel a lot

  Woody Allen

  Thinking, Pay, Hours

  1969 Take the Money and Run.

  19 Copy quote

• If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans.

  Woody Allen

  Life, Laughter, Hipster

  32 Copy quote

• Is it better to be the lover or the loved one? Neither, if your cholesterol is over six hundred. By love, of course, I refer to romantic love -- the love between man and woman, rather than between mother and child, or a boy and his dog, or two headwaiters.

  Woody Allen

  Love, Mother, Dog

  Woody Allen (2007). “The Insanity Defense: The Complete Prose”, Random House Incorporated

  27 Copy quote

• If God exists, I hope he has a good excuse.

  Woody Allen

  Death, Witty, Humorous

  27 Copy quote

• I don't know what I want, but I know what I don't want

  Woody Allen

  Want, Knows

  39 Copy quote

• Everybody knows how awful the world is and what a terrible situation it is and each person distorts it in a certain way that enables him to get through. Some people distort it with religious things. Some people distort it with sports, with money, with love, with art, and they all have their own nonsense about what makes it meaningful, and all but nothing makes it meaningful. These things definitely serve a certain function, but in the end they all fail to give life meaning and everyone goes to his grave in a meaningless way.

  Woody Allen

  Meaningful, Sports, Religious

  "Woody Allen's World: Whatever Works". Interview with Robert E. Lauder, www.commonwealmagazine.org. April 15, 2010.

  38 Copy quote

• Men learn to love the woman they are attracted to. Women learn to become attracted to the man they fall in love with.

  Woody Allen

  Witty, Falling In Love, Humorous

  29 Copy quote

• I believe there is something out there watching us. Unfortunately, it's the government.

  Woody Allen

  Funny, Witty, Humorous

  20 Copy quote

• Right now it's only a notion, but I think I can get the money to make it into a concept, and later turn it into an idea.

  Woody Allen

  Thinking, Ideas, Notion

  Woody Allen, Marshall Brickman (2000). “Annie Hall: scénario bilingue”

  41 Copy quote

• I took a test in Existentialism. I left all the answers blank and got 100.

  Woody Allen

  Funny, Life, Witty

  42 Copy quote

• Taste my tuna casserole - tell me if I put in too much hot fudge.

  Woody Allen

  Hot, Tuna, Fudge

  37 Copy quote

• To love is to suffer. To avoid suffering one must not love. But then one suffers from not loving. Therefore, to love is to suffer. Not to love is to suffer.

  Woody Allen

  Love Is, Movie Love, Suffering

  "Love and Death". www.imdb.com. 1975.

  21 Copy quote

• I have no idea what I am doing but incompetence has never prevented me from plunging in with enthusiasm.

  Woody Allen

  Witty, Humorous, Ideas

  9 Copy quote

• All things are possible, except skiing through a revolving door.

  Woody Allen

  Funny, Doors, Water Skiing

  62 Copy quote

• Everything is controlled by a small evil group to which, unfortunately, no one we know belongs.

  Woody Allen

  Evil, Groups, Knows

  29 Copy quote

• I ran into Isosceles. He had a great idea for a new triangle!

  Woody Allen

  Ideas, Triangles, Great Idea

  24 Copy quote

• My relationship with death remains the same - I'm strongly against it.

  Woody Allen

  Remains

  "Woody Allen's woes over ageing and death" by Fiona Pryor, news.bbc.co.uk. May 15, 2010.

  23 Copy quote

• My wife and I thought we were in love, but it turned out to be benign

  Woody Allen

  Inspiration, Wife, Benign

  13 Copy quote

• I don't believe in the after life, although I am bringing a change of underwear.

  Woody Allen

  Funny, Death, Believe

  30 Copy quote

• I can levitate birds. No one cares.

  Woody Allen

  Witty, Humorous, Bird

  10 Copy quote

• I was in analysis for years because of a traumatic childhood; I was breast-fed through falsies.

  Woody Allen

  Years, Childhood, Analysis

  29 Copy quote

• Chastity is curable, if detected early.

  Woody Allen

  Chastity, Ifs

  32 Copy quote

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