Amusing Quotes - Page 3

• Are you going to come quietly, or do I have to use earplugs?

  Spike Milligan

  Use, Quiet

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• I love Stephen Colbert and Jon Stewart because they're bringing irony back into American humor, which is a delicious treat. The entire Colbert persona of being extreme right-wing when he's not at all is highly amusing. He does it so well, but sometimes a little too well. My wife is convinced he's completely that way.

  John Lydon

  Wings, Wife, Doe

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• What would I put in a museum? Probably a museum! That's an amusing relic of our past.

  John Hodgman

  Past, Museums, Relics

  Biography/Personal Quotes, www.imdb.com.

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• Working with Chaplin was very amusing and strange. His films are so funny, but working with him, I found him to be a very serious man. Whereas the films of Hitchcock are macabre, he could be a very funny man to work with, always telling jokes and holding court. Of course, when I worked with Charlie he was getting older.

  Tippi Hedren

  Funny, Men, Serious Man

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• Mindfulness is a quality that's always there. It's an illusion that there's a meditation and post-meditation period, which I always find amusing, because you're either mindful or you're not.

  Richard Gere

  Meditation, Quality, Mindfulness

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• Love is more pleasant than marriage for the same reason that novels are more amusing than history.

  Nicolas Chamfort

  Love Is, Reason, Novel

  Sébastien-Roch-Nicolas Chamfort (1973). “Chamfort maxims: anecdotes, personalities, letters, historical writings, etc”

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• [London] is sentimental and tolerant. The attitude to foreigners is like the attitude to dogs: Dogs are neither human nor British, but so long as you keep them under control, give them their exercise, feed them, pat them, you will find their wild emotions are amusing, and their characters interesting.

  V. S. Pritchett

  Dog, Attitude, Character

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• Now I can broadcast to an audience of several million people on the 'Today' programme. I can talk about the day's news. But on radio, believe it or not, we have notes and scripts. And while we might ad lib the odd wryly amusing asides, they come at the frequency of a suburban bus. About one every 90 minutes.

  Evan Davis

  Believe, People, News

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• I was the youngest of my entire family so you are tap-dancing to try to get the attention of your older cousins. I really hit my social stride in 6th grade, but before that I was a pretty big dork. You learn how to be amusing and how to work for it.

  Sloane Crosley

  Cousin, Dancing, Trying

  "Book Talk: Sloane Crosley hits brothels, clowns in new essays". Interview with Belinda Goldsmith, uk.reuters.com. June 23, 2010.

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• I don't do emoticons unless I'm making a big deal out of them. I'll type out, 'This is so amusing it makes me want to grin in pixels.' And then do it.

  Sloane Crosley

  Want, Pixels, Type

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• Reading computer manuals without the hardware is as frustrating as reading sex manuals without the software.

  Arthur C. Clarke

  Sex, Reading, Computer

  "The Odyssey File". Book by Arthur C. Clarke, 1984.

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• I've been told to speed up my delivery when I perform. But if I lose the stammer, I'm just another slightly amusing accountant.

  Bob Newhart

  Speed, Delivery, Accountants

  "Biography/Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

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• However my parents - both of whom came from impoverished backgrounds and neither of whom had been to college, took the view that my overactive imagination was an amusing quirk that would never pay a mortgage or secure a pension.

  J. K. Rowling

  College, Views, Imagination

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• Gideon was a force of nature, his magnetic self-possession so powerful it put everyone around him in his shadow. I saw flashes of it every day and was awed by it, but not nearly as much as I was by the charming, wryly amusing lover I had entirely to myself in our private moments together.

  Sylvia Day

  Powerful, Self, Shadow

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• His eyes widened just a bit, his lips flexed. I realized he was trying not to laugh. I hate it when people find my threats amusing.

  Laurell K. Hamilton

  Hate, Eye, People

  Laurell K. Hamilton (2011). “Anita Blake, Vampire Hunter Collection 1-5”, p.699, Penguin

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• I can't bare you when you're not amusing.

  Evelyn Waugh

  I Can

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• Our politics, religion, news, athletics, education and commerce have been transformed into congenial adjuncts of show business, largely without protest or even much popular notice. The result is that we are a people on the verge of amusing ourselves to death.

  Neil Postman

  People, Culture, News

  Neil Postman (2005). “Amusing Ourselves to Death: Public Discourse in the Age of Show Business”, p.18, Penguin

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• All this twaddle, the existence of God, atheism, determinism, liberation, societies, death, etc., are pieces of a chess game called language, and they are amusing only if one does not preoccupy oneself with 'winning or losing this game of chess.

  Marcel Duchamp

  Winning, Games, Chess Game

  Ecke Bonk, Marcel Duchamp (1989). “Marcel Duchamp, the box in a valise: De ou par Marcel Duchamp ou Rrose Sélavy : inventory of an edition”, Rizzoli Intl Pubns

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• I write and write and write, and then I edit it down to the parts that I think are amusing, or that help the storyline, or I'll write a notebook full of ideas of anecdotes or story points, and then I'll try and arrange them in a way that they would tell a semi-cohesive story.

  Al Yankovic

  Notebook, Writing, Thinking

  Biography/Personal Quotes, www.imdb.com.

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• I enjoyed the courtroom as just another stage but not so amusing as Broadway.

  Mae West

  Sassy, Broadway, Stage

  Mae West (1959). “Goodness Had Nothing to Do with it: Autobiography”, Chelsea House

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• There was no working title for the album. The record-jacket designer said `When I think of the group, I always think of power and force. There's a definite presence there.' That was it. He wanted to call it `Obelisk'. To me, it was more important what was behind the obelisk. The cover is very tongue-in-cheek, to be quite honest. Sort of a joke on 2001. I think it's quite amusing.

  Jimmy Page

  Thinking, Important, Groups

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• Criminals are never very amusing. It's because they're failures. Those who make real money aren't counted as criminals. This is a class distinction, not an ethical problem.

  Orson Welles

  Money, Real, Class

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• Her own body was such a familiar and unremarkable thing to her that she was puzzled by the convulsive ecstasy men could take from it, by the intense and amusing need they had merely to touch it, to reach out urgently and press it, squeeze it, pinch it, rub it. She did not understand Yossarian's lust; but she was willing to take is word for it.

  Joseph Heller

  Men, Lust, Needs

  Joseph Heller (1999). “Catch-22: A Novel”, p.312, Simon and Schuster

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• I tend to head for what's amusing because a lot of things aren't happy. But usually you can find a funny side to practically anything.

  Maggie Smith

  Sides, Maggie

  "Biography/ Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

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• I find it amusing on one level, poignant on another, when people try to get recognition from an outside source. It's sad.

  Grace Slick

  People, Trying, Levels

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