Certificates Quotes - Page 5

• I'm tired of hearing about innocent victims. It's fiction, If you live on this planet you're guilty, period, f*** you, next case, end of report. Your birth certificate is proof of guilt.

  George Carlin

  Humorous, Tired, Guilt

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• I think if a physician wrote on a death certificate that old age was the cause of death, he'd be thrown out of the union. There is always some final event, some failure of an organ, some last attack of pneumonia, that finishes off a life. No one dies of old age.

  George Wald

  Life, Science, Thinking

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• Small people delight in what they call consistency-that is, it gives them immense pleasure to say that they believe now exactly as they did ten years ago. This simply amounts to a certificate that they have not grown-that they have not developed-and that they know just as little now as they ever did. The highest possible conception of consistency is to be true to the knowledge of today, without the slightest reference to what your opinion was years ago.

  Robert Green Ingersoll

  Integrity, Believe, Years

  Robert Green Ingersoll (1900). “Tributes and miscellany”

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• Right here, in this same headquarters, 52 years ago, the Convention that gave the birth certificate to the war on drugs was approved.

  Juan Manuel Santos

  War, Years, Drug

  "Guatemalan President Praises Colorado and Washington for Marijuana Legalization at UN Speech" By Daniel Robelo, www.huffingtonpost.com.

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• Today, possible presidential candidate Donald Trump released his birth certificate. It lists his eyes as blue and his hair as ridiculous.

  Conan O'Brien

  Eye, Hair, Blue

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• I have people that have been studying Obama's birth certificate and they cannot believe what they're finding... I would like to have him show his birth certificate, and can I be honest with you, I hope he can. Because if he can't, if he can't, if he wasn't born in this country, which is a real possibility…then he has pulled one of the great cons in the history of politics.

  Donald Trump

  Country, Real, Believe

  "14 of Trump's most outrageous 'birther' claims - half from after 2011" by Gregory Krieg, edition.cnn.com. September 16, 2016.

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• Mitt Romney comes from a Mormon background. I don't know how many wives he has. I'm not saying that I believe in that, I'm just saying he was born on a Mormon compound. I'm not a 'Wifer' but for some reason he's never shown his original marriage certificate.

  Bill Maher

  Believe, Wife, Just Saying

  "Bill Maher Mocks Birthers With Mitt Romney ‘Wifer’ Controversy". www.huffingtonpost.com. May 26, 2012.

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• I want to just take a moment to thank the Teabaggers. Thank you so much for helping us pass health care, for resurrecting the Obama presidency. I know they're saying, 'Why are you thanking me? I was so against it, I marched on Washington with tea bags hanging off my Founding Fathers costume, with a gun on my hip and a picture of Obama dressed as Hitler, screaming about his birth certificate.' And America saw that and said, 'I think I'll go with the calm black man.'

  Bill Maher

  Father, Gun, Men

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• My recollection of the higher school certificate, which involved a practical exam in physics, was being confronted with an experiment involving a sort of barometer arrangement, wondering why I couldn't make it work.

  Peter Higgs

  School, Wonder, Physics

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• Donald Trump showed his birth certificate to reporters. Who cares about his birth certificate? I want to know if that thing on his head has had its vaccinations.

  Craig Ferguson

  Who Cares, Want, Birth

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• I am always looking for ways our government can help make everyday life easier for Ontarians, and these new polymer birth certificates do just that. Having a safe and durable birth certificate will provide more security and help protect people from fraud and identify theft.

  Kathleen Wynne

  Government, People, Everyday

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• Come and see my coaching certificates - they're called the European Cup and league championships.

  Brian Clough

  League, Coaching, Cups

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• The umlaut isn't on my birth certificate. I had this book as a child called Chloe and Maude, and there was an umlaut on the e, and I said, I want that! It's a little flair. Just to confuse people even more.

  Chloe Sevigny

  Children, Book, People

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• When I was born my father spent three weeks trying to find a loophole in my birth certificate.

  Jackie Vernon

  Father, Trying, Three

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• No man or woman in this dispensation will ever enter into the celestial kingdom of God without the consent of Joseph Smith...every man and woman must have the certificate of Joseph Smith, junior, as a passport to their entrance into the mansion where God and Christ are

  Brigham Young

  Men, Kingdoms, Juniors

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• Have you seen these Republican presidential candidates? I bet Obama is sorry now that he spent all that money on the new birth certificate.

  David Letterman

  Sorry, Presidential, Birth

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• No fossil is buried with its birth certificate. That, and the scarcity of fossils, means that it is effectively impossible to link fossils into chains of cause and effect in any valid way... To take a line of fossils and claim that they represent a lineage is not a scientific hypothesis that can be tested, but an assertion that carries the same validity as a bedtime story-amusing, perhaps even instructive, but not scientific.

  Henry Gee

  Mean, Scarcity, Stories

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• President Obama announced his re-election campaign, though it’s not really a surprise. He did all the things that make it official: He filed the paperwork, redesigned his website, and printed another fake birth certificate.

  Craig Ferguson

  Fake, President, Campaigns

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• Now I have something. In fact, I have posted on the Internet more than Obama has. My birth certificate actually has signatures.

  Orly Taitz

  Signatures, Facts, Birth

  "Is This Really Smoking Gun Of Obama's Kenyan Birth?". www.wnd.com. August 2, 2009.

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• The calf scramble will be during both rodeo performances and consist of children attempting to catch and halter several loose calves. If a child succeeds, he or she will receive a certificate to purchase a breeding animal to raise and bring back to the livestock show next year.

  Kim Carnes

  Children, Animal, Years

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• There are few things in life that are harder to find and more important to keep than love. Well, love and a birth certificate.

  Barack Obama

  Things In Life, Important, Birth

  Barack Obama's Speech at White House Correspondents' Dinner, www.c-span.org. May 1, 2010.

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• Check your spiritual birth certificate, you were made in the mighty image of God.

  Joel Osteen

  Spiritual, Birth, Checks

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• Donald Trump says that he will not run for president. You know why? He can't find his birth certificate.

  Jay Leno

  Running, President, Birth

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• Are we Pakistanis, children of a lesser God? Is there one law for the west and one for us? Is our democracy supposed to be only democracy if you give us a no objection certificate?

  Imran Khan

  Children, Law, Giving

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• The online credential, the online certificate is very different from an on campus certificate. And we really believe that online learning and the EdX platform and the EdX portal, these are ways in which - you can think of them as a rising tide that's going to lift all boats whether for students worldwide or on our campuses.

  John Agar

  Believe, Thinking, Online Learning

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