Diapers Quotes

Politicians and diapers must be changed often, and for the same reason.

Mark Twain

Funny, Change, Politics

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Diaper backward spells repaid. Think about it.

Marshall McLuhan

Mom, Baby, Thinking

22 Copy quote
No one likes change... but babies in diapers.

Barbara Johnson

Baby, Likes, Baby Boy

15 Copy quote
Minds, like diapers, need occasional changing.

Karen Cushman

Mind, Needs, Occasional

6 Copy quote
The only time you can change someone is when they are in diapers.

Kris Carr

Only Time

36 Copy quote
Do you live each day as if it's your first or your last? Either way you should probably have a diaper on.

Ellen DeGeneres

Each Day, Way, Lasts

Ellen DeGeneres (2011). “Seriously ... I'm Kidding”, p.16, HarperCollins Australia

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Changing a diaper is a lot like getting a present from your grandmother - you're not sure what you've got but you're pretty sure you're not going to like it.

Jeff Foxworthy

Funny, Humor, Grandmother

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One of the most important things to remember about infant care is: don't change diapers in midstream.

Don Marquis

Important, Literature, Care

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Spread the diaper in the position of the diamond with you at bat. Then fold second base down to home and set the baby on the pitcher's mound. Put first base and third together, bring up home plate and pin the three together. Of course, in case of rain, you gotta call the game and start all over again.

Jimmy Piersall

Inspirational, Baseball, Fathers Day

19 Copy quote
When in doubt, make funny faces.

Amy Poehler

Doubt, Faces, Funny Face

"Amy Poehler: The Seriously Funny Interview". Interview With Joel Keller, www.thedailybeast.com. April 9, 2009.

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Real men change diapers!

Nick Cannon

Real, Men, Inspirational Celebrity

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I'll tell you my routine - it's really exciting. I feed, I burp, I change diapers, I pump. And then I have a tiny window of time to myself.

Marcia Cross

Routine, Pumps, Tiny

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No one's raising children any more. To love a child, you've got to work for it. You have to change its diapers and feed it at night!

Lauren Hutton

Family, Children, Night

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Always remember your kid’s name. Always remember where you put your kid. Don’t let your kid drive until their feet can reach the pedals. Use the right size diapers…for yourself. And, when in doubt, make funny faces.

Amy Poehler

Funny, Kids, Names

"Amy Poehler: The Seriously Funny Interview". Interview with Joel Keller, www.thedailybeast.com. April 9, 2009.

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I can change a diaper in 30 seconds flat. I set the new one beneath the old one. That way, it's just wipe and pull the flap over

Drew Brees

Wipe, Way, Flats

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Men should always change diapers. It's a very rewarding experience. It's mentally cleansing. It's like washing dishes, but imagine if the dishes were your kids, so you really love the dishes.

Chris Martin

Fathers Day, Dad, Kids

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When I sent those scripts, that was the lowest point of my life. We'd just had our second son, and when I went to collect them from hospital, I went to the bank to try and get some money to buy some diapers, the screen showed I've got $26 left.

Ang Lee

Son, Trying, Scripts

"Ang Lee and James Schamus". The Guardian Interview, www.theguardian.com. November 7, 2000.

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And you're headed to a place with no bath and no shower. So you can just imagine how crazy it is to get up there, take your diaper off, have a urine-soaked crotch, and all you can do is wet a washcloth and wipe your skin off. You also have to do it on landing and spacewalks, too. It's not a ride that makes you springtime fresh.

Mike Mullane

Crazy, Skins, Wipe

Source: www.menshealth.com

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In the period where I had to live the life of a citizen - a life where, like everybody else, I did tons of laundry and cleaned toilet bowls, changed hundreds of diapers and nursed children - I learned a lot.

Patti Smith

Children, Live Life, Nurse

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Like many other women, I could not understand why every man who changed a diaper has felt impelled, in recent years, to write a book about it.

Barbara Ehrenreich

Book, Writing, Men

Barbara Ehrenreich (1990). “WORST YEARS OF OUR LIVES”, Pantheon

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A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a hog, conn a ship, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, cooperate, act alone, solve equations, analyze a new problem, pitch manure, program a computer, cook a tasty meal, fight efficiently, die gallantly. Specialization is for insects.

Robert A. Heinlein

Life, Motivational, Atheist

Time Enough for Love "Intermission" (1973)

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Any more bitching from the geriatric crew? What a bunch of old women. Should I hire another crewmate to change your bed diapers while I’m at it? Next time I’ll let The League have you. Vik, I’m relinquishing control back to you. (Devyn) It’s what I live for. By the way, ye organic life forms aren’t the only ones who’ve soiled themselves. Can I have a minute to attend my needs, Captain Asshole? (Vik)

Sherrilyn Kenyon

League, Bed, Needs

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If you were out of a job and your kid needed diapers and your husband just left you, you would be so confused.

Barbara Steele

Jobs, Husband, Confused

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When I go home, I play with my baby dolls and strollers and diaper bags, and play with my sisters.

Dakota Fanning

Sister, Baby, Home

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Whatever it is probably won't go away, so we might as well live and laugh through it. When we double over laughing, we're bending so we won't break. If you think your particular troubles are too heavy and too traumatic to laugh about, remember that laughing is like changing a baby's diaper. It doesn't solve any problems permanently, but it makes things more acceptable for awhile.

Barbara Johnson

Baby, Laughter, Thinking

58 Copy quote