I never worry about diets. The only carrots that interest me are the number of carats in a diamond.
Eat as much as you like-just don't swallow it.
The first thing you lose on a diet is brain mass.
One should eat to live, not live to eat.
If you want to look young and thin, hang around old fat people.
Albert Einstein, who discovered that a tiny amount of mass is equal to a huge amount of energy, which explains why, as Einstein himself so eloquently put it in a famous 1939 speech to the Physics Department at Princeton, 'You have to exercise for a week to work off the thigh fat from a single Snickers.'
I feel about airplanes the way I feel about diets. It seems to me that they are wonderful things for other people to go on.
I've decided that perhaps I'm bulimic and just keep forgetting to purge.
Nothing tastes as good as being thin feels.
It's okay to be fat. So you're fat. Just be fat and shut up about it.
In two decades I've lost a total of 789 pounds. I should be hanging from a charm bracelet.
An optimist is a person who starts a new diet on Thanksgiving Day.
Vegetables are a must on a diet. I suggest carrot cake, zucchini bread, and pumpkin pie.
Eat, drink, and be merry for tomorrow we die.
That's life. The older you get, the tougher it is to score.
The biggest seller is cookbooks and the second is diet books - how not to eat what you've just learned how to cook.
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