My girlfriend told me that she was seeing another man. I told her to rub her eyes.
Between lovers a little confession is a dangerous thing.
It is probably not love that makes the world go around, but rather those mutually supportive alliances through which partners recognize their dependence on each other for the achievement of shared and private goals.
Before I met my husband, I'd never fallen in love. I'd stepped in it a few times.
There's a certain part of the contented majority who love anybody who is worth a billion dollars.
A girl should be two things: classy and fabulous.
Like the measles, love is most dangerous when it comes late in life.
One advantage of marriage is that, when you fall out of love with him or he falls out of love with you, it keeps you together until you fall in again.
Some people are settling down, some people are settling and some people refuse to settle for anything less than butterflies.
All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt.
Like I've always said, love wouldn't be blind if the braille weren't so damned much fun.
Money gives me pleasure all the time.
A kiss is a lovely trick designed by nature to stop speech when words become superfluous.
I'm tired of love; I'm still more tired of rhyme; but money gives me pleasure all the time.
Love is an exploding cigar we willingly smoke.
I got a Valentine's Day card from my girl. It said, 'Take my heart! Take my arms! Take my lips!' Which is just like her. Keeping the best part for herself.
Women are cursed, and men are the proof.
Happiness is an imaginary condition, formerly attributed by the living to the dead, now usually attributed by adults to children, and by children to adults.
Love is much nicer to be in than an automobile accident, a tight girdle, a higher tax bracket or a holding pattern over Philadelphia.
Without Valentine's Day, February would be... well, January.
We sent out 3,000 Valentines to the ladies, asking them to be my voter.
On Valentine's Day, millions of men give millions of women flowers, cards and candy as a heartfelt expression of the emotion that also motivates men to observe anniversaries and birthdays-fear.
I was in a band called The Valentines and they broke up last week.
I feel bad for people who die on Valentine's Day. How much would flowers cost then, ten grand?
Somebody, my daughter or my wife, gave me a music box for Christmas. It plays "My Funny Valentine" on celeste, you know? So I had Bobby [Irving] just play "Jean Pierre" with the changes on celeste.
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