Funny Valentine Quotes - Page 2

• Happy Valentine's Day! And if this is news to you, my guess is you're probably alone. Valentine's Day is often times a, well, it's a manufactured day that really doesn't mean anything.

  Jon Stewart

  Funny, Valentine, Mean

  18 Copy quote
• 

  One word
  Frees us of all the weight and pain of life:
  That word is love.

  Sophocles

  Love, Life, Wedding

  "Oedipus at Colonus". Play by Sophocles, Lines 1616-1618,

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• 'Twas not my lips you kissed but my soul.

  Judy Garland

  I Love You, Valentines Day, I Love Him

  23 Copy quote

• One should always be in love. That is the reason one should never marry.

  Oscar Wilde

  Love, Funny, Sarcastic

  Oscar Wilde (2004). “The Best of Oscar Wilde: Selected Plays and Writings”, p.144, Penguin

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• I'd rather have roses on my table than diamonds on my neck.

  Emma Goldman

  Life, Valentines Day, Nature

  67 Copy quote

• Love is like an hourglass, with the heart filling up as the brain empties.

  Jules Renard

  Love, Inspirational, Valentines Day

  90 Copy quote

• Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't like and give her a house.

  Lewis Grizzard

  Funny, Marriage, Hilarious

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• The heart has its reasons of which reason knows nothing.

  Blaise Pascal

  Love, Inspirational, Life

  Pensees no. 680 (1658)

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• A man loses his sense of direction after four drinks; a woman loses hers after four kisses.

  H. L. Mencken

  Love, Funny Valentines Day, Women

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• This is love: to fly toward a secret sky

  Rumi

  Valentines Day, Sky, Making Love

  Jalāl al-Dīn Rūmī (Maulana), Jelaluddin Rumi, Kabir Helminski, Andrew Harvey (2005). “The Rumi Collection: An Anthology of Translations of Mevlâna Jalâluddin Rumi”, p.53, Shambhala Publications

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• The perfect love affair is one which is conducted entirely by post.

  George Bernard Shaw

  Love, Funny, Humor

  24 Copy quote

• This is love: to fly toward a secret sky, to cause a hundred veils to fall each moment. First to let go of life. Finally, to take a step without feet.

  Rumi

  Love, Valentines Day, Letting Go

  Mewlana Jalaluddin Rumi, “This Is Love”

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• Honesty is the key to a relationship. If you can fake that, you're in.

  Courteney Cox

  Valentines Day, Funny Love, Honesty

  10 Copy quote

• Love doesn't grow on trees like apples in Eden - it's something you have to make. And you must use your imagination too.

  Joyce Cary

  Love, Valentines Day, Eden

  Joyce Cary (1958). “First trilogy: Herself surprised: To be a pilgrim. The horse's mouth”

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• A bride at her second marriage does not wear a veil. She wants to see what she is getting.

  Helen Rowland

  Love, Marriage, Wedding

  "A Guide to Men: Being Encore Reflections of a Bachelor Girl". Book by Helen Rowland. Chapter: "Second Marriages", 1922.

  83 Copy quote

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• You can't put a price tag on preparation for a pandemic.

  Richard E. Besser

  Funny Love, Price Tag, Preparation

  Source: content.time.com

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• The bravest thing that men do is love women.

  Mort Sahl

  Love, Funny Valentines Day, Silly

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• At my age an affair of the heart is a bypass!

  Joan Rivers

  Heart, Age, Bypass

  28 Copy quote

• Valentine's day has gotten blown way out of proportion. Valentine's Day just used to be for your girlfriend or your wife but now everyone's like 'Oh, happy valentine's day!' I even got a Valentine's Day card from my grandmother. How ridiculous is that? We stopped having sex years ago!

  Greg Giraldo

  Funny, Girlfriend, Sex

  41 Copy quote

• Better to have loved and lost than to live with regret.

  Big Pun

  Valentines Day, True Love, Sad Love

  Song: Punish Me, Album: Capital Punishment, 1998

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• Love has the power of making you believe what you would normally treat with the deepest suspicion.

  Honore Gabriel Riqueti, comte de Mirabeau

  Love, Funny Valentines Day, Believe

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• You can't put a price tag on love, but you can on all its accessories.

  Melanie Clark Pullen

  Love, Funny, Relationship

  34 Copy quote

• Valentine's Day: the holiday that reminds you that if you don't have a special someone, you're alone.

  Lewis Black

  Funny Valentines Day, Holiday, Special

  12 Copy quote

• Valentine's Day money-saving tip: Break up on February 13th, get back together on the 15th.

  David Letterman

  Valentines Day, Together, Beets

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• Give me a thousand kisses, then a hundred, then a thousand more.

  Catullus

  Funny Valentines Day, Kissing, Giving

  Gaius Valerius Catullus, Peter Green (2005). “The Poems of Catullus”, p.49, Univ of California Press

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